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Need advice on how to handle a situation

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Pskinner_mma314

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So I'll give the back story 1st. After about a year of failing miserably with anyone of the female sex, I finally met a girl. Beautiful, smart, funny, can sing like an angel. We hit it off great from the start. Well the very 1st night we hung out 1 on 1, the last thing she said to me was "I'm only gonna break your heart." So my dumb ass convinced myself I could get her to change her mind about being in an exclusive relationship. Took care of her when she was sick, bought her new flowers everytime the old ones died, cooked for her all the time, compliments all the time, and took her to see her favorite band live. Fast forward a few months and we were still seeing eachother and she even came to my birthday party with gifts and stuff (had alotta fun with her that night haha). From the next day on for about 3 weeks she was really distant from me and flaked on plans we made 4 different times without an explanation. So when I called her on it, she canned me with 'you're way more into this than me, this was supposed to be casual, I just got out of a fucked up relationship and I don't wanna get in one.'

Here's where I need advice, she has some of my belongings at her place, and I've already asked for them 3 times, and only got one response saying 'I'll bring them to you when I have time.' It's bullshit because she drives by my job everyday on her way to work. Normally I would just say screw it, but one of the things she has is my high school letterman (it wasn't a cheesy situation, it was cold one day and she didn't have a jacket so I just told her to grab one outta my closet, that's what she grabbed). So my question is, how should I go about this and getting my stuff?

Post #1   4/25/14 9:36:40PM   

george112

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Here is the best advice


Dont talk to her for a little while


simple. yet very effective. from the sounds of things it looks like she has gotten use to you waiting on her hand and foot. stop. just ignore her and distance yourself from her just like she did you.

dont be the one to talk to her first. if she wants to talk to you she will trust me.


IF by two weeks you havent heard anything from her and things havent improved simply go to her house knock on the door and ask her for your stuff back.


the temptation to leave want and talk to her will be strong. VERY STRONG. but use self control and just dont. trust me


goodluck. see what happens

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Post #2   4/25/14 10:14:20PM   

Budgellism

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Posted by george112

Here is the best advice


Dont talk to her for a little while


simple. yet very effective. from the sounds of things it looks like she has gotten use to you waiting on her hand and foot. stop. just ignore her and distance yourself from her just like she did you.

dont be the one to talk to her first. if she wants to talk to you she will trust me.


IF by two weeks you havent heard anything from her and things havent improved simply go to her house knock on the door and ask her for your stuff back.


the temptation to leave want and talk to her will be strong. VERY STRONG. but use self control and just dont. trust me

goodluck. see what happens



I completely agree. This would have been my advice as well.

Last edited 4/25/14 10:26PM server time by budgellism
Edit note/reason: n/a

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Post #3   4/25/14 10:25:30PM   

UFC_Fanatic

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Also agreed! I too have a female situation of my own I've been wanting to run by the PG for advice, but I haven't yet thought of a way to put it where it doesn't sound bad/doesn't look like I'm trying to take away some of the facts to save face for anyone involved. I feel your pain.

Post #4   4/25/14 10:40:19PM   

pmoney

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Posted by Budgellism


Posted by george112

Here is the best advice


Dont talk to her for a little while


simple. yet very effective. from the sounds of things it looks like she has gotten use to you waiting on her hand and foot. stop. just ignore her and distance yourself from her just like she did you.

dont be the one to talk to her first. if she wants to talk to you she will trust me.


IF by two weeks you havent heard anything from her and things havent improved simply go to her house knock on the door and ask her for your stuff back.


the temptation to leave want and talk to her will be strong. VERY STRONG. but use self control and just dont. trust me

goodluck. see what happens



I completely agree. This would have been my advice as well.



I would third that. Hell, give it a month. Then go knock on her door, if she hasn't contacted you by then. If she tries to pull the crazy shit, you can always threaten with the 5-0, if you really want your stuff back

Post #5   4/25/14 10:43:23PM   

jae_1833

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Yeah, 2 weeks no contact then knock and grab your things. You have to personally move on bro and that will be the hardest part of all of this.

Post #6   4/26/14 1:26:40AM   

Pskinner_mma314

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Honestly I'm not really mad or bitter. I mean I kinda saw the shit comin after she told me what she told me that 1st night. It was a hopin for the best and doing everything I can sort of thing. I can say I have no regrets, I literally did everything I could, it just didn't work out. I just want my stuff back. The only disappointing thing for me in all this is just realizing that "wow, she really isn't as cool as I thought she was." I've heard through the grapevine, being as we have a lot of mutual friends that she has been "trying" to bring me my stuff, but I call bullshit because she has to put very minimal effort to get it to me and she hasn't.

Post #7   4/26/14 2:53:36AM   

postman

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Ah the time has come to to take OG George's advice. No contact, if this means no drinking then fine. She thinks she has her foot on your neck. She needs the script flipped. Chances are she will be blind sided by it. Girls naturally fall apart when things don't go their own way.

Post #8   4/26/14 4:27:05AM   

Aaronno9

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The problem is that while she still has your stuff theres always gonna be an excuse for contact. On both parts. So just text her like "Im gonna come pick my stuff up at (whatever time you know shes home), see you then", and go get it. Girls like to keep contact with exes who might want them back, its like an emotional blanket for them. Get your shit back, give it a month and she'll either be crawling back or you'll know it was never meant to be regardless. Good luck bro

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Post #9   4/26/14 8:30:27AM   

shaneTpain

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Bitches

Post #10   4/26/14 8:49:16AM   

sparky

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If she wont bring it to you , then go to her house and get it thats what I would of done along time ago.

Fuck giving her time all you want is your things. She doesnt need time to give you your stuff back.

Post #11   4/26/14 9:18:34AM   

Shawn91111

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I disagree with the first few suggestions, the guy wants his shit back and letting it fester for weeks, she will forget about it and he will S.O.L

Go to her place when you know she will be there and pound on the door for your stuff

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Post #12   4/26/14 1:04:01PM   

Michael_Corleone

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Post #13   4/26/14 1:10:43PM   

BlueSkiesBurn

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Posted by Shawn91111

I disagree with the first few suggestions, the guy wants his shit back and letting it fester for weeks, she will forget about it and he will S.O.L

Go to her place when you know she will be there and pound on the door for your stuff



I'm with Shawn on this one. What's the point in tapdancing around the subject? You both clearly seem like you're over each other. Everything else is just games that you don't need to play in life. Show up to her house at a time when you know she will be home and simply state that you are there to retrieve your stuff. As soon as you have said stuff in hand, thank her and go back to your car.

There's really not much need for you to game the girl up and get her to "come back" as some of these people are suggesting. The relationship appears to have ran its course for the both of you and it seems like you're both ready to move on. You might as well avoid all conflict and tell her that you respect her wishes, but the situation doesn't work for you.

Post #14   4/26/14 1:28:13PM   

emfleek

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Be a man. Get your shit and fuck her one last time before telling her to kick rocks.

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Post #15   4/26/14 2:37:56PM   
 
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