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Cowcatcher's last fling

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cowcatcher

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So I met this girl about 2 weeks ago and we started texting. She was seeing another guy, but it wasn't serious yet(they hadn't gotten horizontal) so I figured it was ok to talk to her. We had only hung out once and nothing more than some making out went on.
So I talked to her today and she said broke it off with the other guy and I was a happy camper. She then told me that they had gotten together last week and after dinner and drinks went back to her place and did the . I figure, ok cool, she's being honest, not my first sloppy seconds. Then she tells me about the encounter...
So they get done doing what they're doing and he pops out of bed and says "I have to go to the car and get my inhaler". A few seconds later and he's peeling out of her place. A few days later and she has chlamydia.
I'm not a heartless bastard, but that was the last time I'll be talking to her. Thank god nothing happened with us, I'm not sure if she had it at that point or not as I'm unsure of the timeline and unwilling to talk to her again to ask. I dodged a bullet though, and figured I'd share the story of the chlamydia bandit.

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Post #1   9/28/12 2:17:01AM   

cowcatcher

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P.S. I think she said his name was Kpro...

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Post #2   9/28/12 2:24:52AM   

pmoney

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Damn bro, talk about dodging a bullet! Glad to hear you didn't become a statistic!

I must admit though my first thought was the "I gotta get my inhaler" line is pure genius, albeit the dude being a huge piece of shit.

Last edited 9/28/12 2:34AM server time by pmoney
Edit note/reason: n/a

Post #3   9/28/12 2:33:38AM   

cowcatcher

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Posted by pmoney

Damn bro, talk about dodging a bullet! Glad to hear you didn't becomeca statistic!

I must admit though my first thought was the "I gotta get my inhaler" line is pure genius, albeit the dude being a huge piece of shit.



Although part of me considers him a hero of sorts because of that awesome out, he kind of fucked up my deal there. Well more than kind of. The worst part is I found out during the football game tonight with a bunch of my buddies. They were not kind.

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Post #4   9/28/12 2:36:17AM   

Budgellism

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Posted by cowcatcher

P.S. I think she said his name was Kpro...



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Post #5   9/28/12 3:37:52AM   

george112

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That's a funny.

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Post #6   9/28/12 6:23:55AM   

FastKnockout

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the chlamydia bandit had me rolling

Post #7   9/28/12 6:52:16AM   

thevoodooninja

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That story made me think we need a little guy wiping his forehead, like whoa that was a close one

Post #8   9/28/12 7:48:04AM   

kopower

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Honestly, that chick should try and press charges on the dude, especially if he knowingly gave it to her. That's f'd up man. Glad your little cowcatcher didn't catch the chlamydia.

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Billy Madison-

What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in the playground is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no props, and may the mods have mercy on your soul.


Post #9   9/28/12 8:47:26AM   

emfleek

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I would've at least tried to score a blowjob. BUT, then again, I can't put myself in her shoes. Not sure how emotional I would be after finding out I have the clap.

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Post #10   9/28/12 8:51:56AM   

Theoutlaw08

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Good dodge man. Sounds like typically Milwaukee women. HAHAHAHA. Just kidding. Im guessing she got it from a buddy of mine, who seems to always have some kind of STD. Good dodge Cowcatcher, keep your chin up and find a chick that isnt foaming from the lips.

Post #11   9/28/12 9:03:28AM   

DancingDoll

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Well, at least she told you.

Although honestly I'm kind of surprised she gave you all the details about the other guy (dating, having sex with him, inhaler-getaways). That's a lot of TMI when you're just starting to date someone new, especially if it's going on at the exact same time.

I agree though - probably best to lose her number - for the reasons I mentioned above as well as for her lack of condom-awareness in general, when it comes to first-time-sex, asthma-faking losers like Mr. Clap.

Post #12   9/28/12 9:29:49AM   

Bubbles

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Posted by cowcatcher

P.S. I think she said his name was Kpro...


I thought Kpro was the gonorrhea bandit must have confused him with Fleek

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The best cure for insomnia is a lot of sex. Even if it doesn't end up putting you to sleep, you don't mind so much

Men be careful, female sexual predators are using a date rape drug called a Blowjob to trap men into scams called relationships.

Post #13   9/28/12 9:33:43AM   

kopower

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Posted by Bubbles


Posted by cowcatcher

P.S. I think she said his name was Kpro...


I thought Kpro was the gonorrhea bandit must have confused him with Fleek





_______________________________________
Billy Madison-

What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in the playground is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no props, and may the mods have mercy on your soul.


Post #14   9/28/12 9:40:10AM   

thevoodooninja

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Posted by kopower

Honestly, that chick should try and press charges on the dude, especially if he knowingly gave it to her. That's f'd up man. Glad your little cowcatcher didn't catch the chlamydia.



I guy from where I live got put away this summer for knowingly having HIV and having sex with women

Post #15   9/28/12 9:43:42AM   
 
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