Revenge stories
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Revenge stories
nate22
2/23/07 10:27:37PM
This did not happen to me but a good story all the same and I will cut it short.
Guy fcks girl whilst wasted, pisses inside of her during intercourse, proceeds to fall asleep on bed.
Wakes up on floor, the girl has taken a shite on his chest and fcked of and left. He never saw or heard form her again.
Funny thing is the guy actually goes around bragging about that story.
Guy fcks girl whilst wasted, pisses inside of her during intercourse, proceeds to fall asleep on bed.
Wakes up on floor, the girl has taken a shite on his chest and fcked of and left. He never saw or heard form her again.
Funny thing is the guy actually goes around bragging about that story.
loller90278
2/23/07 10:33:03PM
Posted by mrsumo
Posted by madmarck
Posted by mrsumo
Everyone knows that all the good military stories start with, "No shit, there we were..."
I have heard none that start like that................. you ever been in the forces? The best ones are always.......... "I remember back in ______ we saw so much ____"
For example i had a Sergent who siad " I remember back in 82 in cyprus. The heat was 60 celisus it jsut hit you like a wall. Too bad we didnt get to blow up shit there. I love the smell of cordite when a shell is fired....... when the wind blows it in your face oh boys its better than hvaing a women after a long tour"
No joke.
Yes shit monkey, I was in the Army. I had a tour in Rawanda and a tour in Bosnia, before the news changed the name of the war to Kosovo. Besides, how did you have a sergeant? I thought you said you were in the Navy reserves? And it doesn't surprise me that you never heard any stories that sound like that, the one you just told sounds like a line from Canadian Apocalypse Now.
Ydoc
2/23/07 11:18:04PM
Posted by mrsumo
Posted by madmarck
Posted by mrsumo
Everyone knows that all the good military stories start with, "No shit, there we were..."
I have heard none that start like that................. you ever been in the forces? The best ones are always.......... "I remember back in ______ we saw so much ____"
For example i had a Sergent who siad " I remember back in 82 in cyprus. The heat was 60 celisus it jsut hit you like a wall. Too bad we didnt get to blow up shit there. I love the smell of cordite when a shell is fired....... when the wind blows it in your face oh boys its better than hvaing a women after a long tour"
No joke.
Yes shit monkey, I was in the Army. I had a tour in Rawanda and a tour in Bosnia, before the news changed the name of the war to Kosovo. Besides, how did you have a sergeant? I thought you said you were in the Navy reserves? And it doesn't surprise me that you never heard any stories that sound like that, the one you just told sounds like a line from Canadian Apocalypse Now.
madmarck
2/24/07 1:42:05PM
Posted by mrsumo
Posted by madmarck
Posted by mrsumo
Everyone knows that all the good military stories start with, "No shit, there we were..."
I have heard none that start like that................. you ever been in the forces? The best ones are always.......... "I remember back in ______ we saw so much ____"
For example i had a Sergent who siad " I remember back in 82 in cyprus. The heat was 60 celisus it jsut hit you like a wall. Too bad we didnt get to blow up shit there. I love the smell of cordite when a shell is fired....... when the wind blows it in your face oh boys its better than hvaing a women after a long tour"
No joke.
Yes shit monkey, I was in the Army. I had a tour in Rawanda and a tour in Bosnia, before the news changed the name of the war to Kosovo. Besides, how did you have a sergeant? I thought you said you were in the Navy reserves? And it doesn't surprise me that you never heard any stories that sound like that, the one you just told sounds like a line from Canadian Apocalypse Now.
In the CF you have someone from any element has a instruter for your basic trainging (bootcamp). It doesnt matter its all just the standard stuff so everyone has to know it. The Canadian forces are far different from the American Military. Our Military is One Force just with 3 elements. Where as you as far as i know have 4 (5 in wartime with the coastguard).
Svartorm
2/25/07 4:41:28AM
Posted by madmarck
Posted by Svartorm
If he seriously said cordite, hes ******* retarded. Cordite hasn't been used in ammo for over 100 years. Hollywood seems to have a hard-on for it though.
It stopped being produced it 1995 in weapons Like shells. He served in Cyprus in 1982. So it fights in. And it was used majorly in WW2. It was invented till about 120 years ago.
Sorry, I misread the story as him talking about firing a "shot" as opposed to a "shell". Cordite hasn't been used in bullets since WW1, but every time someone fires a bullet on tv, someone says "It smells like cordite!"
madmarck
2/25/07 9:55:38AM
Posted by Svartorm
Sorry, I misread the story as him talking about firing a "shot" as opposed to a "shell". Cordite hasn't been used in bullets since WW1, but every time someone fires a bullet on tv, someone says "It smells like cordite!"
Thats alright. I might have left out that my Sgt had been in the armoured divison back in the day.
ButterBalls
2/25/07 11:47:25PM
My roommate had this crazy ass girlfriend for like 6 months. She was just an all around bitch and a loon to top it off. They ended up getting in a fight one night, she got physical, he told her to leave, and she refused. We ended up having to call the cops on her dumb ass.
So she proceeds to pretty much stalk him after this. He ignores her, but she just won't leave him alone, even after he blocks her on AIM, deletes all her emails, ignores all her calls etc etc.
Well one night she just kinda shows up at the door, and asks him to break his lease with me and move into an apartment with her. He says no, your a crazy bitch and I don't even want to talk to you, let alone live with you. So she storms out, and about an hour later leaves this jewel of a voicemail on his phone.
Part 1
So of course, we decide to post it on the internet. Google videos, myspace, youtube, the whole nine yards. Now about a week later apparently she didn't get the hint...she comes over again. We won't let her in the house, so she proceeds to call him like 25 times or something. In her never ending brilliance, she decided to leave another voicemail!
part 2
He ends up going outside, tells her to **** off and leave or we're calling the cops (again). An hour later or so I think she finally got the hint and left.
That basically ended it, although that was months ago and she still emails him and shit all the time. She tried the whole "Oh no I'm preggers!" thing as well (of course, don't they all?). She ended up making a video for him and giving it to him as well, not sure what was on it though, he threw it away because he said he was "done, its over, I don't want to prolong it anymore" although I really wish we could have put that on the internet as well.
He still has both videos on his frontpage for Myspace though. Stupid bitch.
So she proceeds to pretty much stalk him after this. He ignores her, but she just won't leave him alone, even after he blocks her on AIM, deletes all her emails, ignores all her calls etc etc.
Well one night she just kinda shows up at the door, and asks him to break his lease with me and move into an apartment with her. He says no, your a crazy bitch and I don't even want to talk to you, let alone live with you. So she storms out, and about an hour later leaves this jewel of a voicemail on his phone.
Part 1
So of course, we decide to post it on the internet. Google videos, myspace, youtube, the whole nine yards. Now about a week later apparently she didn't get the hint...she comes over again. We won't let her in the house, so she proceeds to call him like 25 times or something. In her never ending brilliance, she decided to leave another voicemail!
part 2
He ends up going outside, tells her to **** off and leave or we're calling the cops (again). An hour later or so I think she finally got the hint and left.
That basically ended it, although that was months ago and she still emails him and shit all the time. She tried the whole "Oh no I'm preggers!" thing as well (of course, don't they all?). She ended up making a video for him and giving it to him as well, not sure what was on it though, he threw it away because he said he was "done, its over, I don't want to prolong it anymore" although I really wish we could have put that on the internet as well.
He still has both videos on his frontpage for Myspace though. Stupid bitch.
madmarck
2/26/07 9:28:13AM
wow butterballs that chick is straight up crazy. And not in a wild good way. A weird creepish way.
Stickan
2/26/07 12:02:14PM
Posted by butterballs
My roommate had this crazy ass girlfriend for like 6 months. She was just an all around bitch and a loon to top it off. They ended up getting in a fight one night, she got physical, he told her to leave, and she refused. We ended up having to call the cops on her dumb ass.
So she proceeds to pretty much stalk him after this. He ignores her, but she just won't leave him alone, even after he blocks her on AIM, deletes all her emails, ignores all her calls etc etc.
Well one night she just kinda shows up at the door, and asks him to break his lease with me and move into an apartment with her. He says no, your a crazy bitch and I don't even want to talk to you, let alone live with you. So she storms out, and about an hour later leaves this jewel of a voicemail on his phone.
Part 1
So of course, we decide to post it on the internet. Google videos, myspace, youtube, the whole nine yards. Now about a week later apparently she didn't get the hint...she comes over again. We won't let her in the house, so she proceeds to call him like 25 times or something. In her never ending brilliance, she decided to leave another voicemail!
part 2
He ends up going outside, tells her to **** off and leave or we're calling the cops (again). An hour later or so I think she finally got the hint and left.
That basically ended it, although that was months ago and she still emails him and shit all the time. She tried the whole "Oh no I'm preggers!" thing as well (of course, don't they all?). She ended up making a video for him and giving it to him as well, not sure what was on it though, he threw it away because he said he was "done, its over, I don't want to prolong it anymore" although I really wish we could have put that on the internet as well.
He still has both videos on his frontpage for Myspace though. Stupid bitch.
The vids didn't work for me. Do I have to sign up to watch em?
madmarck
2/26/07 2:02:36PM
arent they just audio? Its just a pic you can see i thought.
Stickan
2/26/07 5:08:50PM
Posted by madmarck
arent they just audio? Its just a pic you can see i thought.
no audio no nothing
madmarck
2/26/07 6:48:39PM
Posted by Stickan
Posted by madmarck
arent they just audio? Its just a pic you can see i thought.
no audio no nothing
Well it worked for me. Too bad.
aceprone
3/22/07 3:01:55AM
here's a great south park episode I found on myspace about revenge.....CLASSIC!
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=1263379230
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=1263379230
madmarck
3/22/07 7:18:31AM
I got a new revenge story. I was at a St Patty's day party the other night. Going off my rocker dancing, somehow. Anyway I was dancing with this girl for maybe a half hour. After i stop we sit down on a couch and she tells me she really likes me. Now being wasted i dont have the common sense to stop looking at her friends tits. Her friend being the one i like. So she gets pissed and tries to throw her drink in my face. Luckily she only had a half inch of drink left. So the Vodka didnt sting that much. So i said okay, and passed out.
Heres the kicker. I wake up and my friend is dragging me out the door, he props me up while he has a smoke. He says we are leaving right after so i say fair enough. Then the girl who i was dancing with comes up and says she was sorry. So i tihnk okay. She says "can i have a kiss goodnight then? " Thinking she is one of those insane chicks i figure might as well. So we both lean in and just before i giver her a quick peck, She sticks a smoke in her mouth. Burned my lip.
Not good. On the way home we had to stop so i could puke, burned like a motherf***er. God dam women are mean.
Heres the kicker. I wake up and my friend is dragging me out the door, he props me up while he has a smoke. He says we are leaving right after so i say fair enough. Then the girl who i was dancing with comes up and says she was sorry. So i tihnk okay. She says "can i have a kiss goodnight then? " Thinking she is one of those insane chicks i figure might as well. So we both lean in and just before i giver her a quick peck, She sticks a smoke in her mouth. Burned my lip.
Not good. On the way home we had to stop so i could puke, burned like a motherf***er. God dam women are mean.
cowcatcher
3/22/07 10:54:14AM
these aren't revenge stories but i have a cousin my friends and i have ****** with for years so i figured id share em
my cousin was a complete hornball and tried to get on any chick he could and when he did end up getting a girlfriend and finally got laid he was the happiest guy in the world so i figured i should take him down a notch. i went to the local adult gift store with my girlfriend and looked around for something to get him and found a box labeled penis enlarging kit which when opened contained a magnifying glass so i had her write a little note in her handwriting from his girlfriend and stuck it in his door, knocked and drove away. after that his story about screwing his ex became the "i wasnt fully hard" story and to this day he has no idea it wasnt her.
i was bored one night and was outside my cousins apartment complex with some of my friends that also lived there and since my cousin wasnt home i decided to gather up about 50 lightning bugs and walked into his house with them(my aunt was home) proceeded to go to his room and left the lid off the jar and closed his door. when i got back outside my friends and i just watched his bedroom window light up for like a half an hour cracking up the whole time. he knew it was me but it was still hilarious.
we used to call my cousin over and over some days saying in a gruff voice "this is sargeant slaughter, have you been doing your pushups?" and although it doesnt seem too bad by itself, doing it 20 times a day really pissed him off. so one evening after calling him as the sarge all day my friends and i were having some beers with the girlfriends and decided to have my friends girl call my cousin and act like she met him at a church festival. as i mentioned earlier the guy is a total hornball so he proceeded to talk to her and say things like "i was probably drunk when we met, me and my friends get drunk all the time" which to him was a great pick up line. so as hes getting more and more interested in her she says my friend who was with me the night we met wants to talk to you and she handed the phone to my buddy who let out a huge "THIS IS SARGEANT SLAUGHTER!!!" all my cousin could mutter was a whiny NIIIIII sound before going into a tirade and hanging up. we recorded it on my buddys old tape answering machine but the tape has since disappeared.
thats just 3 mikey stories, there have been more but ill save em for court when he snaps and tries to kill me.
my cousin was a complete hornball and tried to get on any chick he could and when he did end up getting a girlfriend and finally got laid he was the happiest guy in the world so i figured i should take him down a notch. i went to the local adult gift store with my girlfriend and looked around for something to get him and found a box labeled penis enlarging kit which when opened contained a magnifying glass so i had her write a little note in her handwriting from his girlfriend and stuck it in his door, knocked and drove away. after that his story about screwing his ex became the "i wasnt fully hard" story and to this day he has no idea it wasnt her.
i was bored one night and was outside my cousins apartment complex with some of my friends that also lived there and since my cousin wasnt home i decided to gather up about 50 lightning bugs and walked into his house with them(my aunt was home) proceeded to go to his room and left the lid off the jar and closed his door. when i got back outside my friends and i just watched his bedroom window light up for like a half an hour cracking up the whole time. he knew it was me but it was still hilarious.
we used to call my cousin over and over some days saying in a gruff voice "this is sargeant slaughter, have you been doing your pushups?" and although it doesnt seem too bad by itself, doing it 20 times a day really pissed him off. so one evening after calling him as the sarge all day my friends and i were having some beers with the girlfriends and decided to have my friends girl call my cousin and act like she met him at a church festival. as i mentioned earlier the guy is a total hornball so he proceeded to talk to her and say things like "i was probably drunk when we met, me and my friends get drunk all the time" which to him was a great pick up line. so as hes getting more and more interested in her she says my friend who was with me the night we met wants to talk to you and she handed the phone to my buddy who let out a huge "THIS IS SARGEANT SLAUGHTER!!!" all my cousin could mutter was a whiny NIIIIII sound before going into a tirade and hanging up. we recorded it on my buddys old tape answering machine but the tape has since disappeared.
thats just 3 mikey stories, there have been more but ill save em for court when he snaps and tries to kill me.
Svartorm
3/23/07 4:59:52AM
Good old prank phone calls.
Fun Svartorm Fact: I was arrested when I was 11 years old because I kept calling my 6th grade Science Teacher after school and filling her answering machine. I hated that bitch.
Fun Svartorm Fact: I was arrested when I was 11 years old because I kept calling my 6th grade Science Teacher after school and filling her answering machine. I hated that bitch.
Pyrenus
3/23/07 3:24:17PM
Oh man, we used to do some awesome prank phone calls. The best was to use 3 way calling and connect two people who didn't know each other. Most of the time they just argued over who called who, but sometimes they actually get pissed and start verbally abusing each other.
One time we hooked up two people who knew each other and they proceeded to have a nice long conversation.
You ever get people that call you with the wrong number asking for someone you've never heard of? You ever pretend to be that person? Well, I was just being a jerk one time and got myself into a situation that I couldn't easily get out of.
Phone Rings*
Me: Hello?
Is this Mark?
Me: Yep.
Hey Mark this is Todd.
Me: Hey Todd, how are you doing?
Not too good man, Grandma died this morning.
*** At this point, I felt like dirt. I couldn't just say "HAHAH JUST KIDDING I"M NOT MARK!!" so I ended up talking to this guy for about 30 minutes about his dead grandmother.
When he finally hung up, I was really relieved. But then I felt bad again. I bet the real Mark missed his grandmother's funeral. :(
One time we hooked up two people who knew each other and they proceeded to have a nice long conversation.
You ever get people that call you with the wrong number asking for someone you've never heard of? You ever pretend to be that person? Well, I was just being a jerk one time and got myself into a situation that I couldn't easily get out of.
Phone Rings*
Me: Hello?
Is this Mark?
Me: Yep.
Hey Mark this is Todd.
Me: Hey Todd, how are you doing?
Not too good man, Grandma died this morning.
*** At this point, I felt like dirt. I couldn't just say "HAHAH JUST KIDDING I"M NOT MARK!!" so I ended up talking to this guy for about 30 minutes about his dead grandmother.
When he finally hung up, I was really relieved. But then I felt bad again. I bet the real Mark missed his grandmother's funeral. :(
Svartorm
3/24/07 3:05:31AM
I DID THAT!!!!! The butcher called my house right after my grandmother died, and he was looking for my father, who had dropped off a deer earlier in the week. I picked up the phone and said "Hello?" and this butched seriously went on talking to me as if I was my father for a solid five minutes. Then he started asking me questions, and I didn't want to say "Dude, you just wasted five minutes pouring your heart out to a 16 year old kid.", so I just pretended I was my dad. It was weird.
The only time I **** with people on the phone now is at work, because no one ever calls a convenience store with anything legit. Usually I don't bother answering it unless I'm expecting a call, because it'll be too painful.
'Hello, White Hen."
"Hi, do you guys sell orthopedic shoes?"
"Thats all we sell." *click*
The only time I **** with people on the phone now is at work, because no one ever calls a convenience store with anything legit. Usually I don't bother answering it unless I'm expecting a call, because it'll be too painful.
'Hello, White Hen."
"Hi, do you guys sell orthopedic shoes?"
"Thats all we sell." *click*
mrsumo
3/25/07 4:55:58AM
I love wrong numbers, especially when they are asking for a girl.
"Is lisa there?
Yea
Can I talk to her?
No
Why not?
Cause my d**k's in her mouth!
Got that from andrew dice clay!
"Is lisa there?
Yea
Can I talk to her?
No
Why not?
Cause my d**k's in her mouth!
Got that from andrew dice clay!
Svartorm
3/6/08 12:28:57AM
Bumped a little before its one year anniversary. I'm sure you guys have done some mean ass shit in the last year. Lets hear it!
Daddyprimetime
3/6/08 1:26:38AM
Posted by Stickan
I shoved his tooth brush up my ass,
Dude did you actually penetrate yourself????
Pookie
3/6/08 1:29:37AM
Posted by Daddyprimetime
Posted by Stickan
I shoved his tooth brush up my ass,
Dude did you actually penetrate yourself????
Don't worry, it's a swedish thing.
loller90278
3/6/08 1:49:04AM
funny posts above.
going back to my story on page one (long read)
my ex best friend and ex girlfriend are currently in france now.
he's finishing culinary school and shes attending flight school.
jesus sometimes life is one big mind fu*k
going back to my story on page one (long read)
my ex best friend and ex girlfriend are currently in france now.
he's finishing culinary school and shes attending flight school.
jesus sometimes life is one big mind fu*k
hotrodttt
3/6/08 1:52:03AM
If you guys have ever seen the Dudeson's you will love my story, So when me my Dad and a couple of Friends were Paintballing down at the fire trail near my house where it is illegal ass S*#t to have any Firearms because it's a preserved wildlife trail. So my neighbor being the hobag that she is calls the cops and instantly started a war that she can't win. So we knew nothing about the cops being called so we see the cops roll up and we have a clear visual. So we start running up the hot ass desert mountain which is like a 12 mile hike. We were so tired and pissed off and we arrived home about 10 hours later.
So we knew we had to get her back so we start plotting ideas and we came up with the perfect ones. We stroll up to their house at about 2 a.m with a saw, and icepick and a bag of my friends shit.
The first pasrt of the plan was to empty the bag of shit into their mailbox and their mailbox is a reach in type so they can't see what they are picking up. The 2nd part of the plan is to icepick their tires which means to let all of the air out of their tires and we put syrup all over their windows which can;t be washed off.
The Sweet Revenge gets Good when we have the saw, they have a huge deck that oversees the ocean so we cut that shizzle up, we cut 2 legs in half so they would break a couple of days later since the weather was windy. And right on time their deck collapses with her on it and she ends up breaking her leg.
The cops show up at our house the next day and asks if we had any involvement on what happend and we said, " No " and they said, " Ok " and they left.
So we knew we had to get her back so we start plotting ideas and we came up with the perfect ones. We stroll up to their house at about 2 a.m with a saw, and icepick and a bag of my friends shit.
The first pasrt of the plan was to empty the bag of shit into their mailbox and their mailbox is a reach in type so they can't see what they are picking up. The 2nd part of the plan is to icepick their tires which means to let all of the air out of their tires and we put syrup all over their windows which can;t be washed off.
The Sweet Revenge gets Good when we have the saw, they have a huge deck that oversees the ocean so we cut that shizzle up, we cut 2 legs in half so they would break a couple of days later since the weather was windy. And right on time their deck collapses with her on it and she ends up breaking her leg.
The cops show up at our house the next day and asks if we had any involvement on what happend and we said, " No " and they said, " Ok " and they left.
Rush
3/6/08 10:32:47AM
This isn't something I've done, but it's something I would like to do.
I'm in an apt. building facing the back of the building. There are a row of houses along the back and every summer, for weeks these damn kids are in the backyard swimming and partying to the late hours of the night (it's actually the screaming and carrying on that is the most annoying, but splashing a in a pool is enough to keep you from going to sleep). I remember trying to take a nap one afternoon, after a 15 mile run and they were playing guitar hero. Needless to say they sucked ass, which made it really annoying. If you've played or seen guitar hero played, you'll know what I mean.
Because there are about three apartment buildings within ears reach of their party, they disturb a lot of people and a lot of people can be heard yelling at them or call the police. Honestly, I would love to send them a message. I would love to get a group of friends together each with paper bags filled with shit and toss them all in the pool while they are partying. I'm sure the cops will have little sympathy for them considering they've been called several times about them.
I'm in an apt. building facing the back of the building. There are a row of houses along the back and every summer, for weeks these damn kids are in the backyard swimming and partying to the late hours of the night (it's actually the screaming and carrying on that is the most annoying, but splashing a in a pool is enough to keep you from going to sleep). I remember trying to take a nap one afternoon, after a 15 mile run and they were playing guitar hero. Needless to say they sucked ass, which made it really annoying. If you've played or seen guitar hero played, you'll know what I mean.
Because there are about three apartment buildings within ears reach of their party, they disturb a lot of people and a lot of people can be heard yelling at them or call the police. Honestly, I would love to send them a message. I would love to get a group of friends together each with paper bags filled with shit and toss them all in the pool while they are partying. I'm sure the cops will have little sympathy for them considering they've been called several times about them.
emfleek
3/6/08 10:34:20AM
Posted on the other thread...didn't realize this one existed.
---------------------
My old roommate stacked chairs and other random objects against the bathroom door one time while I was taking a dump. He rigged it so that when I opened the door to come out of the bathroom, all of this stuff would fall on me. Well, it worked and I'm pretty sure the chair and paint can that fell on me broke something in my foot, but whatever.
Anyways...if you know my buddy, which you don't, you'd know that he takes a dump at about the same time EVERY NIGHT. He comes home after work, falls asleep on the couch after drinking 3 or 4 beers, wakes up, eats dinner and continues drinking. Around 10:30 every night, he's gotta drop ass...
SO...one Friday night, we had all been drinking and telling stories and whatnot. Well, the story about him stacking shit against the door while I was in the bathroom came up. He swore that it was in retaliation for the time I put a rubberband around the spraygun on the sink. He had went to wash dishes, turned the faucet on and the gun sprayed him. I argued that it was not as bad as what he did. Anyways...I decided to make my move.
I saran wrapped the toilet. There were 4 of us there. Me, my buddy and 2 of his friends from work. I let them in on what I was doing and the whole time we're waiting for him to use the bathroom, we're all sitting there with dick-swell because we have to piss so bad. Finally, the time came.
A few minutes after he went to the bathroom we hear a REALLY loud, "WHAT THE F*CK? FLEEK!!!! YOU F*CKING CO*KSUCKER!!"
It was a disgusting mess. There was shit EVERYWHERE. Down the side of the toilet, on the toilet seat, on HIM. Needless to say, he had to shower and clean the bathroom and after he was done, he was so pissed off that he spent the rest of the night in his room.
BUT...I won and he never tried to get me back.
---------------------
My old roommate stacked chairs and other random objects against the bathroom door one time while I was taking a dump. He rigged it so that when I opened the door to come out of the bathroom, all of this stuff would fall on me. Well, it worked and I'm pretty sure the chair and paint can that fell on me broke something in my foot, but whatever.
Anyways...if you know my buddy, which you don't, you'd know that he takes a dump at about the same time EVERY NIGHT. He comes home after work, falls asleep on the couch after drinking 3 or 4 beers, wakes up, eats dinner and continues drinking. Around 10:30 every night, he's gotta drop ass...
SO...one Friday night, we had all been drinking and telling stories and whatnot. Well, the story about him stacking shit against the door while I was in the bathroom came up. He swore that it was in retaliation for the time I put a rubberband around the spraygun on the sink. He had went to wash dishes, turned the faucet on and the gun sprayed him. I argued that it was not as bad as what he did. Anyways...I decided to make my move.
I saran wrapped the toilet. There were 4 of us there. Me, my buddy and 2 of his friends from work. I let them in on what I was doing and the whole time we're waiting for him to use the bathroom, we're all sitting there with dick-swell because we have to piss so bad. Finally, the time came.
A few minutes after he went to the bathroom we hear a REALLY loud, "WHAT THE F*CK? FLEEK!!!! YOU F*CKING CO*KSUCKER!!"
It was a disgusting mess. There was shit EVERYWHERE. Down the side of the toilet, on the toilet seat, on HIM. Needless to say, he had to shower and clean the bathroom and after he was done, he was so pissed off that he spent the rest of the night in his room.
BUT...I won and he never tried to get me back.
mmadb
3/6/08 12:06:40PM
I'm not particularily a vengeful person, I should be the recipient of revenge but I never seem to be since I tend to mess with people who are too stupid to realize they are being messed with.
I work with this meathead who has to be literally the dumbest person over the age of 20 I have ever met in my life and every time he opens his mouth he comes out sounding like a retard. I've since stopped talking to him as it's stressful to even have a conversation with him and I constantly have to fix his mistakes and explain to him how dumb he is.
I've recorded many videos before I stopped talking to him and posted them on youtube so I can prove to other people he really exists.
The following video is the only one of me doing anything remotely revengelike but it makes me chuckle nonetheless. All the other videos are just him explaining things he doesn't even understand, like event horizons and how to wire an ethernet cable.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzWUiENODq4
I work with this meathead who has to be literally the dumbest person over the age of 20 I have ever met in my life and every time he opens his mouth he comes out sounding like a retard. I've since stopped talking to him as it's stressful to even have a conversation with him and I constantly have to fix his mistakes and explain to him how dumb he is.
I've recorded many videos before I stopped talking to him and posted them on youtube so I can prove to other people he really exists.
The following video is the only one of me doing anything remotely revengelike but it makes me chuckle nonetheless. All the other videos are just him explaining things he doesn't even understand, like event horizons and how to wire an ethernet cable.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzWUiENODq4
TNunley
3/6/08 12:19:51PM
Great stories everyone. Here's one of my own:
Back in high school there was this girl who I really liked (isn't that the beginning of most revenge stories?). Anyway, this girl flirted with me all the time and talked about me taking her out and everything. We hung out all the time, and she introduced me to her parents (her mom was pretty hot herself). Anyway, I constantly found myself wondering, "Are we friends? Or are we together?" So I figured I would set up a date that would guarantee me an answer to this question. She acted all happy and excited, and told me that she's glad I asked because she really likes me. So come time for me to pick her up she has a change of heart and decides she's going to go out with another guy. Typically it wouldn't matter to me, there are plenty of fish in the sea... and it would have been less stressful with a different girl anyway. So... this was back in the time that the internet was still really young, and everyone got on MSN Messenger. Her mom had talked to me quite a bit when this girl and I were hanging out, and she didn't stop after this incident (do you already see where this is going?). She liked to play games too like her daughter (mind games) of flirting, but with her you almost "know" she's just playing around. Anyway, she invited me over one afternoon (I skipped school) to talk about everything that went on. I mentioned this to some of my close friends, and they half-way joked around about sleeping with her and how funny it would be since her daughter screwed me over. So I go over to her house not knowing what to expect, but assumed we were just going to talk like she had said. As I walk through the door, she closes the door and grabs me and starts kissing me... now in High School I thought I was the man... I thought I was a pimp, and that I was hot shit... nothing could have prepared me for a sexy middle aged woman, who just happens to be the mother of a girl that screwed me over, doing this. Anyway, you can guess where it went from there. This was about the same time the movie American Pie had come out, so my friends gave me the nickname of "Finch" (ya know, the guy with Stiffler's mom?). Well, it doesn't matter how great of friends you have, and how loyal they are to you... a secret like that just can't go untold. So they all did the, "I'm gonna tell you something that you have to promise you won't say". Then the people they told that to did the same thing, and on and on it went. It lasted about a week before this girl found out, and she was PISSED!!!! Not nearly as pissed as her dad was though... I really thought I was going to be shot because as soon as you walk into their house you can clearly see a full gun cabinet, so I know the guy has guns and it would be fair to say that he has used them a time or two before (so he knows how to shoot). I felt pretty bad and maybe the girl didn't deserve it (the dad definitely didn't), but needless to say no girl ever did that to me again... and most guys at the school treated me like a God after hearing about it.... The End!
Back in high school there was this girl who I really liked (isn't that the beginning of most revenge stories?). Anyway, this girl flirted with me all the time and talked about me taking her out and everything. We hung out all the time, and she introduced me to her parents (her mom was pretty hot herself). Anyway, I constantly found myself wondering, "Are we friends? Or are we together?" So I figured I would set up a date that would guarantee me an answer to this question. She acted all happy and excited, and told me that she's glad I asked because she really likes me. So come time for me to pick her up she has a change of heart and decides she's going to go out with another guy. Typically it wouldn't matter to me, there are plenty of fish in the sea... and it would have been less stressful with a different girl anyway. So... this was back in the time that the internet was still really young, and everyone got on MSN Messenger. Her mom had talked to me quite a bit when this girl and I were hanging out, and she didn't stop after this incident (do you already see where this is going?). She liked to play games too like her daughter (mind games) of flirting, but with her you almost "know" she's just playing around. Anyway, she invited me over one afternoon (I skipped school) to talk about everything that went on. I mentioned this to some of my close friends, and they half-way joked around about sleeping with her and how funny it would be since her daughter screwed me over. So I go over to her house not knowing what to expect, but assumed we were just going to talk like she had said. As I walk through the door, she closes the door and grabs me and starts kissing me... now in High School I thought I was the man... I thought I was a pimp, and that I was hot shit... nothing could have prepared me for a sexy middle aged woman, who just happens to be the mother of a girl that screwed me over, doing this. Anyway, you can guess where it went from there. This was about the same time the movie American Pie had come out, so my friends gave me the nickname of "Finch" (ya know, the guy with Stiffler's mom?). Well, it doesn't matter how great of friends you have, and how loyal they are to you... a secret like that just can't go untold. So they all did the, "I'm gonna tell you something that you have to promise you won't say". Then the people they told that to did the same thing, and on and on it went. It lasted about a week before this girl found out, and she was PISSED!!!! Not nearly as pissed as her dad was though... I really thought I was going to be shot because as soon as you walk into their house you can clearly see a full gun cabinet, so I know the guy has guns and it would be fair to say that he has used them a time or two before (so he knows how to shoot). I felt pretty bad and maybe the girl didn't deserve it (the dad definitely didn't), but needless to say no girl ever did that to me again... and most guys at the school treated me like a God after hearing about it.... The End!
emfleek
3/6/08 1:21:54PM
Posted by TNunley
Great stories everyone. Here's one of my own:
Back in high school there was this girl who I really liked (isn't that the beginning of most revenge stories?). Anyway, this girl flirted with me all the time and talked about me taking her out and everything. We hung out all the time, and she introduced me to her parents (her mom was pretty hot herself). Anyway, I constantly found myself wondering, "Are we friends? Or are we together?" So I figured I would set up a date that would guarantee me an answer to this question. She acted all happy and excited, and told me that she's glad I asked because she really likes me. So come time for me to pick her up she has a change of heart and decides she's going to go out with another guy. Typically it wouldn't matter to me, there are plenty of fish in the sea... and it would have been less stressful with a different girl anyway. So... this was back in the time that the internet was still really young, and everyone got on MSN Messenger. Her mom had talked to me quite a bit when this girl and I were hanging out, and she didn't stop after this incident (do you already see where this is going?). She liked to play games too like her daughter (mind games) of flirting, but with her you almost "know" she's just playing around. Anyway, she invited me over one afternoon (I skipped school) to talk about everything that went on. I mentioned this to some of my close friends, and they half-way joked around about sleeping with her and how funny it would be since her daughter screwed me over. So I go over to her house not knowing what to expect, but assumed we were just going to talk like she had said. As I walk through the door, she closes the door and grabs me and starts kissing me... now in High School I thought I was the man... I thought I was a pimp, and that I was hot shit... nothing could have prepared me for a sexy middle aged woman, who just happens to be the mother of a girl that screwed me over, doing this. Anyway, you can guess where it went from there. This was about the same time the movie American Pie had come out, so my friends gave me the nickname of "Finch" (ya know, the guy with Stiffler's mom?). Well, it doesn't matter how great of friends you have, and how loyal they are to you... a secret like that just can't go untold. So they all did the, "I'm gonna tell you something that you have to promise you won't say". Then the people they told that to did the same thing, and on and on it went. It lasted about a week before this girl found out, and she was PISSED!!!! Not nearly as pissed as her dad was though... I really thought I was going to be shot because as soon as you walk into their house you can clearly see a full gun cabinet, so I know the guy has guns and it would be fair to say that he has used them a time or two before (so he knows how to shoot). I felt pretty bad and maybe the girl didn't deserve it (the dad definitely didn't), but needless to say no girl ever did that to me again... and most guys at the school treated me like a God after hearing about it.... The End!
We're not worthy! We're not worthy!
SmileR
3/6/08 1:26:19PM
Posted by Rush
This isn't something I've done, but it's something I would like to do.
I'm in an apt. building facing the back of the building. There are a row of houses along the back and every summer, for weeks these damn kids are in the backyard swimming and partying to the late hours of the night (it's actually the screaming and carrying on that is the most annoying, but splashing a in a pool is enough to keep you from going to sleep). I remember trying to take a nap one afternoon, after a 15 mile run and they were playing guitar hero. Needless to say they sucked ass, which made it really annoying. If you've played or seen guitar hero played, you'll know what I mean.
Because there are about three apartment buildings within ears reach of their party, they disturb a lot of people and a lot of people can be heard yelling at them or call the police. Honestly, I would love to send them a message. I would love to get a group of friends together each with paper bags filled with shit and toss them all in the pool while they are partying. I'm sure the cops will have little sympathy for them considering they've been called several times about them.
Haha man you should defiantly do that!!
Any revenge with poo is priceless! If you wanted to be really mean you could add some water to the bags too and shake it up so they mix. Then just before you throw poke little holes in the top of the bag a few times an the shitty water would spray all over them as the bag falls!
I had the same problem a last year when i lived with my parents. Some loud mouthed kid always screaming an shouting with his buddies until really late. It kept my mum awake so i grabbed him one day an stuck him in a wheely bin duct taped it so the top was open a bit but not enough to climb out an filled it up with a hose.
Haha the thing stunk! But now him and his chump friends listen when my mum asks them nicely to turn down their music of stop screaming like women at 2 in the morning.