Revenge stories

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Svartorm
2/18/07 5:37:07AM
Maybe I'm petty or vindictive or cruel or immature or any combination of those things, but I love revenge, and I know deep down inside, so does everyone else. Does anyone have any good revenge stories to share?

I'll share one from a friend of mine. We both worked at a Pizza Hut during and after high school, and there was a manager there that we couldn't stand for various reasons. Now, as an upper level manager at Pizza Hut, your salary was directly related to inspection scores, which were mostly based on having the place really clean. This is a stupid way to do things because managers would let the place go to shit while they're busy scrubbing garbage cans, as they want a raise.

So, the night before an inspection, this manager comes in on her day off with a woe-is-me story about how she can't even have a day off because we won't get the place clean enough for the inspection tomorrow, and she has to come in and do it herself. She then sweeps the place, fills up the mop bucket to do the floors, and heads into the bathrooms to sweep in there as well.

So, while shes in there, my friend runs around the counter, grabs the mop bucket, and pours half the water out the side door. He then runs over to the cooler, pulls out two 2 liter bottles of root beer, and pours them into the mop bucket.

When that shit dried, it was 10x worse than any movie theater I've ever been in, and it took two days and a scrubbing with a deck brush to get it back to normal. Stupidly enough, the inspection actually came out pretty good regardless of the floor, but it was still worth a laugh.

Ok, now share people.
mrsumo
2/18/07 6:38:16AM
A buddy and I worked 12 hour shifts doing security at a construction site back in 1998. On the weekends security ran 24 hours so there were two shifts. The guys on the day shift were just crap weasels. They were always trying to get us in trouble with some bullshit like the breakroom was messy or our logs weren't done. So one day we ordered some pizza and there happened to be abour 4 or 5 pieces left over. We knew these guys were going to be in soon. Now, this was august, and it was freakin hot. So we grabbed some napkins and sopped up all the ball, ass, and taint sweat we could and rubbed it all over the pizza. At least we were smart enough not to rub the pizza directly on the nads. They came in and we exchanged the usual banter. Then we offered them the remainder of the pizza, stating how tired of pizza we were. They gladly accepted and relieved us for the day. 12 hours later when we came to work there was the pizza box on top of the trash, with 4 crusts left behind.

Those were the good old days.
nate22
2/18/07 9:04:51AM
Inspiration for revenge?

Chan-wook Park's film trilogy...

Oldboy
Sympathy for Lady Vengance
Sympathy for Mr Vengance.

Stickan
2/18/07 10:25:14AM
When me and a few of my friends were in Poland I got wasted and passed out on my bed at the hotel. One of my friends put tooth paste in my ass while I was asleep and I woke up wondering if I had shat myself.
That was pretty nasty so the next day I shoved his tooth brush up my ass, cleaned the toilett with it and put it back in his bag.

He didn't notice anything until after he had brushed his teeth and said something like "**** man, this was a nasty tooth paste". Me and my friends burst out in tears laughing so we had to tell him.
He moved to another room and didn't speak to any of us for a month.

He picked the wrong roomie to mess with
loller90278
2/18/07 1:21:52PM
bout a year back my ex was secretly goin behind my back to go on dates with my best friend, at the same time i was boinking her. one night when we were piss drunk she came over to the party and my best friend told me she was down for some "train action" at first (bein drunk) i got excited but the moment she came i puked in my mouth and asked my friend to drive me home.. in the car they hooked up while i was barely conscious.. that being done i realized what happened the next morning furious and confronted my best friend.. he said he was really sorry blah blah he was drunk, and offered to go bodies ( a game/fight where you can only hit the opponent in the body, no face shots) with me to relieve some tension.. needless to say i was more than glad, and in the midst of going bodies i go psycho and start wailing on his face.. he was knocked out cold for a little while and didn't seem to be too mad afterwards..we're fine now, but the girl is a different story..


she went to brazil like 3 days after that happened and didnt have the chance to talk to me about it, she apoligized but i said i'd never talk to her and for her to have a good life.. heres where it gets twisted... she came to my house like 3 months after the event saying she missed me blah blah she made the biggest mistake of her life.. and as a fool i accepted her apology.. we saw each other for maybe a good 2 months more when all of a sudden she tells me that shes seeing ANOTHER one of my friends (my best friend at the time) and is dating him (while im boinking her...) the guy knew about my past history with her and promised to never hook up with her/like her out of friendship (bros before hoes?) all of a sudden he's goin behind my back and secretly goin on dates with her..so this time i cut both of them out of my life.. and a week later a mutual friend of all of us told me that the guy wasn't sorry for what he did and never thought of me as a friend..

now this is pretty current so every time i see him in random places he runs away (runs red lights ) to avoid me.. but to get revenge in a way i can i am currently seeing the girls best friend, and the guys ex girlfriend at the same time. along with it i am goin to prom with the girls best friend (while she brings my ex-best friend as her date) so it might get heated there.

haha i feel sorry for anybody to read this, its even confusing to me, i should write a telenovela or a soap (All My Friends...)

Stickan
2/18/07 2:57:07PM

Posted by loller90278

bout a year back my ex was secretly goin behind my back to go on dates with my best friend, at the same time i was boinking her. one night when we were piss drunk she came over to the party and my best friend told me she was down for some "train action" at first (bein drunk) i got excited but the moment she came i puked in my mouth and asked my friend to drive me home.. in the car they hooked up while i was barely conscious.. that being done i realized what happened the next morning furious and confronted my best friend.. he said he was really sorry blah blah he was drunk, and offered to go bodies ( a game/fight where you can only hit the opponent in the body, no face shots) with me to relieve some tension.. needless to say i was more than glad, and in the midst of going bodies i go psycho and start wailing on his face.. he was knocked out cold for a little while and didn't seem to be too mad afterwards..we're fine now, but the girl is a different story..


she went to brazil like 3 days after that happened and didnt have the chance to talk to me about it, she apoligized but i said i'd never talk to her and for her to have a good life.. heres where it gets twisted... she came to my house like 3 months after the event saying she missed me blah blah she made the biggest mistake of her life.. and as a fool i accepted her apology.. we saw each other for maybe a good 2 months more when all of a sudden she tells me that shes seeing ANOTHER one of my friends (my best friend at the time) and is dating him (while im boinking her...) the guy knew about my past history with her and promised to never hook up with her/like her out of friendship (bros before hoes?) all of a sudden he's goin behind my back and secretly goin on dates with her..so this time i cut both of them out of my life.. and a week later a mutual friend of all of us told me that the guy wasn't sorry for what he did and never thought of me as a friend..

now this is pretty current so every time i see him in random places he runs away (runs red lights ) to avoid me.. but to get revenge in a way i can i am currently seeing the girls best friend, and the guys ex girlfriend at the same time. along with it i am goin to prom with the girls best friend (while she brings my ex-best friend as her date) so it might get heated there.

haha i feel sorry for anybody to read this, its even confusing to me, i should write a telenovela or a soap (All My Friends...)




Damn you got some lousy "best" friends.... Don't your friends have any sisters you can sleep with? The only thing worse than your enemy dating your ex or current girlfriend is him dating your little sister.
Ydoc
2/18/07 4:53:36PM
Not really sure if it counts as revenge, but when I when I was younger I went to a summer camp, and they had this annoying girl (think Meg Griffen but a little fuglier) that would do our laundry. She thought she had some kind of authority over us because she cleaned our clothes... no idea how that works. Anyway, last day comes and before she comes in we decide to poor mop water on her, so the smallest guy crawls into the rafters of the cabin and I hand him the dirty water bucket. She comes in a while later, trying to lecture us about something I don't remember and then boom... she's all dirty and wet and starts crying, and when the laughing starts dying down she runs out which only kick starts the laughing again.

loller90278
2/18/07 5:37:26PM

Posted by Stickan

Damn you got some lousy "best" friends.... Don't your friends have any sisters you can sleep with? The only thing worse than your enemy dating your ex or current girlfriend is him dating your little sister.



hehe no, none of them have siblings... except the best friend that i punched in the face.. he has a younger brother .. i guess that might explain their behavior!

Svartorm
2/18/07 6:20:44PM
Ok, I'll do up another one. This is the same manager as the first story.

Long story short, I get a phone call one night from the dude that poured the rootbeer in the mop bucket, and tells me theres a child rapist eating dinner in the dining room. This is a dude I know for a fact is a child rapist (hes registered with the state as a felonious sex offender on a child less than 12 years old), and everyone that works there knows it to, because hes married to a former employee. We had assumed he was going to jail for it, but because it was a cousin he assaulted, the family didn't press charges, so long as he agreed to go to counciling. I wasn't cool with that idea, so myself and my friend had decided we'd take this guy out if we ever saw him again. Being as he was working, it fell on me to do so. I grabbed a ski mask and my blackjack, and ran to the pizza place. The idea was the rush in the door, smoke him with the blackjack, run out, and take a back way home so I couldn't get caught.

So, I get there, and I'm looking in the windows, and the waitress has sat him in the far corner, so theres no way in hell I can actually run in and do this, especially with other customers in the building and with him having family there. I'm too pissed off at this point to do nothing though, so I walk in, go over to his table and tell him hes a foul ******* monster that deserves nothing less than death, etc etc. I call him out to a fight, which he refuses, and he starts crying in front of him brother and his girlfriend. I'm at least somewhat content about this, so I leave.

The next day, the afformentioned manager has called the store owner and told her I had threated his life, scared away customers, and basically blows the whole thing out of proportion, and I end up getting fired over it.

So, now I want revenge on this clam for spinning a story to get me fired, so I go in there one night when only my friend is working, hop on the stores computer and get all her personal information. I then spent the evening signing her up to every swingers, one night stand, and gangbang sites I can find, signing her up for every creepy fetish I could think of, leaving her phone number, and saying to only call between the hours of midnight and 4am. She never mentioned it to anyone at work, but she had thousands of hits on the profiles I made for her, so you know some sketchy mother****ers were waking her up at night wanting to piss in her mouth.
Snacks
2/18/07 11:24:11PM

Posted by loller90278


Posted by Stickan

Damn you got some lousy "best" friends.... Don't your friends have any sisters you can sleep with? The only thing worse than your enemy dating your ex or current girlfriend is him dating your little sister.



hehe no, none of them have siblings... except the best friend that i punched in the face.. he has a younger brother .. i guess that might explain their behavior!




Go out with his younger brother, then.
loller90278
2/19/07 1:11:40PM

Posted by Svartorm

Ok, I'll do up another one. This is the same manager as the first story.

Long story short, I get a phone call one night from the dude that poured the rootbeer in the mop bucket, and tells me theres a child rapist eating dinner in the dining room. This is a dude I know for a fact is a child rapist (hes registered with the state as a felonious sex offender on a child less than 12 years old), and everyone that works there knows it to, because hes married to a former employee. We had assumed he was going to jail for it, but because it was a cousin he assaulted, the family didn't press charges, so long as he agreed to go to counciling. I wasn't cool with that idea, so myself and my friend had decided we'd take this guy out if we ever saw him again. Being as he was working, it fell on me to do so. I grabbed a ski mask and my blackjack, and ran to the pizza place. The idea was the rush in the door, smoke him with the blackjack, run out, and take a back way home so I couldn't get caught.

So, I get there, and I'm looking in the windows, and the waitress has sat him in the far corner, so theres no way in hell I can actually run in and do this, especially with other customers in the building and with him having family there. I'm too pissed off at this point to do nothing though, so I walk in, go over to his table and tell him hes a foul ******* monster that deserves nothing less than death, etc etc. I call him out to a fight, which he refuses, and he starts crying in front of him brother and his girlfriend. I'm at least somewhat content about this, so I leave.

The next day, the afformentioned manager has called the store owner and told her I had threated his life, scared away customers, and basically blows the whole thing out of proportion, and I end up getting fired over it.

So, now I want revenge on this clam for spinning a story to get me fired, so I go in there one night when only my friend is working, hop on the stores computer and get all her personal information. I then spent the evening signing her up to every swingers, one night stand, and gangbang sites I can find, signing her up for every creepy fetish I could think of, leaving her phone number, and saying to only call between the hours of midnight and 4am. She never mentioned it to anyone at work, but she had thousands of hits on the profiles I made for her, so you know some sketchy mother****ers were waking her up at night wanting to piss in her mouth.



wow dude you werent lying when you said you were vindictive
pv3Hpv3p
2/19/07 5:13:31PM

Posted by nate22

Inspiration for revenge?

Chan-wook Park's film trilogy...

Oldboy
Sympathy for Lady Vengance
Sympathy for Mr Vengance.




Just watched 'OldBoy' kinda by accident, my buddy thought it might be cool so he had it sent to him by mail (NetFlix type thing)...

Man... All I could say was, 'Wow' for the duration of the movie...

I hope it doesn't ruin it for anyone, but revenge by hypnosis-induced-incest is the way to go in my book...

Wow...
loller90278
2/19/07 9:39:01PM

Posted by pv3Hpv3p


Posted by nate22

Inspiration for revenge?

Chan-wook Park's film trilogy...

Oldboy
Sympathy for Lady Vengance
Sympathy for Mr Vengance.




Just watched 'OldBoy' kinda by accident, my buddy thought it might be cool so he had it sent to him by mail (NetFlix type thing)...

Man... All I could say was, 'Wow' for the duration of the movie...

I hope it doesn't ruin it for anyone, but revenge by hypnosis-induced-incest is the way to go in my book...

Wow...



funny we mentioned this movie in this thread.. thats the last movie i watched with my ex-gf (the cheating son of a goat)

Svartorm
2/20/07 1:15:53AM

Posted by loller90278

she went to brazil like 3 days after that happened and didnt have the chance to talk to me about it, she apoligized but i said i'd never talk to her and for her to have a good life.. heres where it gets twisted... she came to my house like 3 months after the event saying she missed me blah blah she made the biggest mistake of her life.. and as a fool i accepted her apology.. we saw each other for maybe a good 2 months more when all of a sudden she tells me that shes seeing ANOTHER one of my friends (my best friend at the time) and is dating him (while im boinking her...) the guy knew about my past history with her and promised to never hook up with her/like her out of friendship (bros before hoes?) all of a sudden he's goin behind my back and secretly goin on dates with her..so this time i cut both of them out of my life.. and a week later a mutual friend of all of us told me that the guy wasn't sorry for what he did and never thought of me as a friend..



You know what you should do? Call her up and tell her you were having sex with that ex-best friend, and just found out you have some STD*, and he might have given it to her as well. That way she ditches him for banging you and getting a disease, and will likely waste a few hundred bucks on tests to find out shes clean (or not). Plus the guy will get angry you implied he was gay and might come looking for a fight, so you'll get to beat the crap out of him too.

*Not sure what the laws are in Georgia on this, but in the US this is actually illegal. Just throwing the idea out there though.
hippysmacker
2/22/07 1:59:55AM
I fear my story will not be as viscious as the ones I've seen, but I laughed hysterically. It's a true story I'm putting in a book I'm writing , but still the funniest thing I've ever seen or heard ,and they will all be known by their college nicknames to protect the indiviuals involved . In college my buddy The McNab was on the BYU powerlifting team, His roomate who was on the basketball team was named Derwood, but the McNab's best friend the Fedo did not like him. McNab and Derwood were mormons with Derwood actually being a practicing good boy. Anyway the Fedo( also not a practicing mormon ) got kicked off the powerlifting team for Roids and was afraid to tell his parent's. The McNab wanted him to stay in their dorm . Derwood didn't like the Fedo , because he was a jerk in every way you could mention, and said no. While they were in class Mcnab would let him crash there anyway. One day while Fedo was raiding the fridge Derwood came home and got pissed and told the Fedo to go. The Fedo( all 300 lbs. of roided muscle of him) took exception to this and responded with his trademark line" nobody f**ks with the Fedo!" and went to town. He threw Derwood across the room and proceeded to whip out his slong and start pissing on Derwoods bed. McNab showed up about now and distracted the Fedo by asking what was going on. Derwood meanwhile jumped up and grabbed a can of mace and sprayed the Fedo in the face. Fedo turned and got some piss on Derwood, angered by this Derwood then sprayed him in the dick with the mace. Fedo started running around blind and smashed into to the wall and fell down writhing in pain till the Mcnab was able to get some water in his eyes. The Fedo then proceeded to lay sideways on the sink , hold open his peehole and splash water in it. Mcnab said he literally shat himself while this was happening it was so funny. Anyway, campus security showed up from all the screaming and arrested the Fedo who was banned from campus. The McNab bailed him out with the promise that the Fedo would let bygone be bygones. Well he forgot " Nobody" F**ks with the Fedo! " Derwood's family was coming to visit, and he cooked a big family meal for all, to which the McNab was invited. It was a big deal. Borrowing a table, chairs,cooked a whole feast. The McNab innocently told the Fedo he couldn't hang out that night because he was invited to the family dinner. Now Derwood shopped at Cosco for his groceries and had one of those econo-size tubs of butter, which was half full. He cooked all the food ,set it out in covered bowls and trays to keep it hot : and of course set the buttertub and other condiments on the table. The Mcnab and Derwood went across campus to guide the parent's to the room. Meanwhile the Fedo went into the apartment grabbed the buttertub and proceeded into the bathroom to take a giant dump in it. Trembling with evil glee, he resealed the butter tub and set it back on the kitchen table. The Fedo then climbed under the Mcnab's bed ( the dorm was all one room) and waited for the feast. The McNab, Derwood and family all came in and sat down, and after some smalltalk all joined hands and said their prayers before eating. The Fedo said he almost ruptured an intestine trying not to laugh while they were praying. Anyway after grace, everybody started dishing out the food. Momma Derwood decided to butter her corn and the McNab obligingly passed it to her. the McNab swears it smelled like the stench of what hell must smell like or "refried hott butered sh*t " as the Fedo put it less poetically. The mom , so shocked by the appearance and stench immediately dropped the tub in the mashed potatoes serving bowl, and the giant crap slid out to comingle with the spuds. She then fell out of her chair rolled over on all fours and started projectile vomiting. The sister yakked too. Meanwhile amidst the chaos the Fedo slithers out from beneath the bed, jumps up on it , throws back his head and shouted victoriously to the heavens " NOBODY F**KS WITHTHE FEDO" then fled out the door laughing hysterically.

THE END
Svartorm
2/22/07 2:33:35AM
Wow, thats ******* brutal! Poor mom!

A short one to keep this going. My brother works at Gold's Gym as a desk guy and membership director, and needless to say, theres a lot of meatheads working there. One such guy has a habit of shaking everyones hand, but does it the meathead way where you grab on like you're trying to crush the life out of their hand and shake it with extreme gusto. My brother brought it up before and told him not to do it because its annoying and he has a bad elbow, but the guy made it out like my brother was a pussy and couldn't handle a "firm" handshake.

So, the next time the guy wanted to shake hands, my brother used a bit of stance work, anchored his hand and when the guy want to pump the hand, ended up spraining his own wrist. Now he just pats my brother on the back.
Stickan
2/22/07 9:38:54AM

Posted by hippysmacker

I fear my story will not be as viscious as the ones I've seen, but I laughed hysterically. It's a true story I'm putting in a book I'm writing , but still the funniest thing I've ever seen or heard ,and they will all be known by their college nicknames to protect the indiviuals involved . In college my buddy The McNab was on the BYU powerlifting team, His roomate who was on the basketball team was named Derwood, but the McNab's best friend the Fedo did not like him. McNab and Derwood were mormons with Derwood actually being a practicing good boy. Anyway the Fedo( also not a practicing mormon ) got kicked off the powerlifting team for Roids and was afraid to tell his parent's. The McNab wanted him to stay in their dorm . Derwood didn't like the Fedo , because he was a jerk in every way you could mention, and said no. While they were in class Mcnab would let him crash there anyway. One day while Fedo was raiding the fridge Derwood came home and got pissed and told the Fedo to go. The Fedo( all 300 lbs. of roided muscle of him) took exception to this and responded with his trademark line" nobody f**ks with the Fedo!" and went to town. He threw Derwood across the room and proceeded to whip out his slong and start pissing on Derwoods bed. McNab showed up about now and distracted the Fedo by asking what was going on. Derwood meanwhile jumped up and grabbed a can of mace and sprayed the Fedo in the face. Fedo turned and got some piss on Derwood, angered by this Derwood then sprayed him in the dick with the mace. Fedo started running around blind and smashed into to the wall and fell down writhing in pain till the Mcnab was able to get some water in his eyes. The Fedo then proceeded to lay sideways on the sink , hold open his peehole and splash water in it. Mcnab said he literally shat himself while this was happening it was so funny. Anyway, campus security showed up from all the screaming and arrested the Fedo who was banned from campus. The McNab bailed him out with the promise that the Fedo would let bygone be bygones. Well he forgot " Nobody" F**ks with the Fedo! " Derwood's family was coming to visit, and he cooked a big family meal for all, to which the McNab was invited. It was a big deal. Borrowing a table, chairs,cooked a whole feast. The McNab innocently told the Fedo he couldn't hang out that night because he was invited to the family dinner. Now Derwood shopped at Cosco for his groceries and had one of those econo-size tubs of butter, which was half full. He cooked all the food ,set it out in covered bowls and trays to keep it hot : and of course set the buttertub and other condiments on the table. The Mcnab and Derwood went across campus to guide the parent's to the room. Meanwhile the Fedo went into the apartment grabbed the buttertub and proceeded into the bathroom to take a giant dump in it. Trembling with evil glee, he resealed the butter tub and set it back on the kitchen table. The Fedo then climbed under the Mcnab's bed ( the dorm was all one room) and waited for the feast. The McNab, Derwood and family all came in and sat down, and after some smalltalk all joined hands and said their prayers before eating. The Fedo said he almost ruptured an intestine trying not to laugh while they were praying. Anyway after grace, everybody started dishing out the food. Momma Derwood decided to butter her corn and the McNab obligingly passed it to her. the McNab swears it smelled like the stench of what hell must smell like or "refried hott butered sh*t " as the Fedo put it less poetically. The mom , so shocked by the appearance and stench immediately dropped the tub in the mashed potatoes serving bowl, and the giant crap slid out to comingle with the spuds. She then fell out of her chair rolled over on all fours and started projectile vomiting. The sister yakked too. Meanwhile amidst the chaos the Fedo slithers out from beneath the bed, jumps up on it , throws back his head and shouted victoriously to the heavens " NOBODY F**KS WITHTHE FEDO" then fled out the door laughing hysterically.

THE END



Wow....just wow..

damn what a dick...
crimethinc
2/22/07 11:56:53AM
This is more of a revenge tactic then an actual revenge story, but it was told to me by my German teacher in high school and it is the single most useful piece of information I learned in High School. I can't even remeber the subject matter of the context of the conversation but he told my class that he would spray pepper spray into the vents of people's cars so that way while they are driving if they turn on there air conditioning they get a blast of pepper spray courtesy of there ventilation system. I only remember like 20 German words but I have never forgotten this.
madmarck
2/22/07 1:38:46PM
Wow Hippysmacker im nto gonna mess with Fedo.

My story is a strange one.
This happened at boot Camp. My Buddy who will go unamed Stuck a Condom in a picture frame i had of me and my best friend. So i went into his room to mess up some of his shit. He was in there so i basically ripped his bed to pieces (something you have perfect at boot) and he put me ina clinch. In the Ensuing scfuffle Our combat boots made shitloads of black marks all over his room floor (something hard to get out). He eventually let go of me and i grabbed his photo and sutck ran away with it only to return it with a condom stuck in it (not original but good).
So anyways after that he is cleaning his floor and gets pissed so he charges into my room and tackles me to the floor. In a second i pull guard and stick him in a a gulliotine and tell him to say "Im marcs bitch" He wont though he doesnt give a shit about being choked as he is scfuffing his boots against my floor. So i just let him go and push hmi out of my room.
This is where it gets good. Later on he is cleaning his Rifle int he Hallway and i decided to "make amends". We talk and say its all in fun (which it was). But what he doesnt realize is that while he is cleaning his rifle with Q-tips while we are talking, I am taking the Q-tips he hasnt used yet and sticking them up my runny nose. So He cleaned his Rifle with Snot. He didnt realize it. Until the Next day. I remember waiting for my room to get inspected and hearing the MS rip him a new asshole for having the inside of his rifle all dirty and sticky. He still doenst know how that happend to this day considering he cleaned it for a full hour.
God Im Good.
hippysmacker
2/22/07 1:52:14PM
SNeaky revenge Marck, and you didn't get caught.
aceprone
2/22/07 2:42:35PM
Talking military stories, when I was in Iraq, there was a female Sgt. that no one really cared for. She was a nice lady, but some of the NCO's and other soldiers didn't like her. And she would always put carmex on her lips, constently. So one night in our repair shop (more like a trailer), me, a fellow soldier and a NCO were relaxing in the shop and notice the female Sgt. carmax was on the counter. So the NCO hanging out with us decides to "mushroom head" the carmax in hopes that the female Sgt will use it. So while it was a funny gesture, the next day, a male Sgt. who was in charge of the shop functions comes in the shop and picks up the carmax and used it continously throughout the day.

I know it's not really a revenge story, but it was WAY funnier when our boss used it instead because he was a complete A-hole.
mrsumo
2/22/07 11:02:02PM
Everyone knows that all the good military stories start with, "No shit, there we were..."
Svartorm
2/23/07 5:19:39AM
HAHAHA! I "mushroomheaded" a lot of stuff when I worked at the pizza place, or put the boot to some stuff. My favorite was when this lady who always tried to scam us called up complaining about her order again and said she was coming down to get a replacement pizza. My friend had bought a pogo stick a few days before, so we took her pizza outside and took turns pogo sticking through the mud and then jumping into the pizza. At least she had something legitimate to bitch about after that.
mrsumo
2/23/07 5:24:24AM
Now I know I will never eat dinner at your place. Although, I did see some pretty nasty happenings when I worked at an old country buffet. I was a dishwasher so I didn't have a hand in it but, you see stuff like food getting dropped and picked back up, coughing, dudes wiping sweat with their hand and going back to touching the food. I swear, it was like 15 years ago, but I still wouldn't trust anything there but the soda.
Svartorm
2/23/07 6:01:12AM
Yeah, thats no good. I didn't screw with someones food unless they tried to scam us (which happened quite a bit), or someone was exceedingly rude. The worst thing I saw was when a dude told one of our waitresses to "f*ck off" because she wouldn't serve him a beer while he waited for a pizza at the counter, so we used the dough for the pizza like a mop to clean the dish room floor.
madmarck
2/23/07 7:56:08AM

Posted by mrsumo

Everyone knows that all the good military stories start with, "No shit, there we were..."


I have heard none that start like that................. you ever been in the forces? The best ones are always.......... "I remember back in ______ we saw so much ____"

For example i had a Sergent who siad " I remember back in 82 in cyprus. The heat was 60 celisus it jsut hit you like a wall. Too bad we didnt get to blow up shit there. I love the smell of cordite when a shell is fired....... when the wind blows it in your face oh boys its better than hvaing a women after a long tour"
No joke.
Svartorm
2/23/07 6:19:43PM
If he seriously said cordite, hes ******* retarded. Cordite hasn't been used in ammo for over 100 years. Hollywood seems to have a hard-on for it though.
hippysmacker
2/23/07 6:44:12PM
Svartom you could be an addition to the writing team if they make "Waiting" part 2 . Hillarious movie
madmarck
2/23/07 8:51:50PM

Posted by Svartorm

If he seriously said cordite, hes ******* retarded. Cordite hasn't been used in ammo for over 100 years. Hollywood seems to have a hard-on for it though.


It stopped being produced it 1995 in weapons Like shells. He served in Cyprus in 1982. So it fights in. And it was used majorly in WW2. It was invented till about 120 years ago.
mrsumo
2/23/07 10:20:18PM

Posted by madmarck


Posted by mrsumo

Everyone knows that all the good military stories start with, "No shit, there we were..."


I have heard none that start like that................. you ever been in the forces? The best ones are always.......... "I remember back in ______ we saw so much ____"

For example i had a Sergent who siad " I remember back in 82 in cyprus. The heat was 60 celisus it jsut hit you like a wall. Too bad we didnt get to blow up shit there. I love the smell of cordite when a shell is fired....... when the wind blows it in your face oh boys its better than hvaing a women after a long tour"
No joke.



Yes shit monkey, I was in the Army. I had a tour in Rawanda and a tour in Bosnia, before the news changed the name of the war to Kosovo. Besides, how did you have a sergeant? I thought you said you were in the Navy reserves? And it doesn't surprise me that you never heard any stories that sound like that, the one you just told sounds like a line from Canadian Apocalypse Now.
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