Men's bathroom etiquette!

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BigTomZ
6/23/07 5:35:08PM
Why can't people respect my buffer zone?

Earlier today I am in the bathroom at work. It is a big bathroom. You go in and around the corner and there are 8 urinals along the wall. I am the only person in there and I am at the urinal at the far end of the row. Some dude comes in, and comes all the way down the row, walking past 6 open urinals, and uses the one right next to me. What is worse is that he farted while he was next to me. Everyone farts in the bathroom, but did he really need to be close to someone to do it? Part of me wanted to just turn and piss on his leg.

What is with that? Do people not know about proper men's room etiquette? What happened to the minimum 1 urinal buffer zone?
Mastodon2
6/23/07 6:36:11PM
Such obvious breaking of the "Guard Zone" is an obvious attempt to catch a glimpse of your spongle, avoid him at all costs in future. Or turn towards the wall.
jdubs
6/23/07 6:39:50PM
holy shit man, thats when you beat his ass.. damn queer
Ydoc
6/23/07 7:04:41PM
I hate that. It's like when someone puts their towels near your towel at the beach when no one is there.

My boss takes the cake though, he talked to me from the stall while I was trying to piss. When fluids are escaping my body I don't really care for small talk.
ButterBalls
6/23/07 7:36:07PM
I don't mind talking while I'm pissing. However, the other day I got into the office early but my stomach was killing me (hangover). I go into the bathroom and commence one of the worst whiskey shit sessions of my life. Right before round 2 started, someone walks into the stall next to me and pretty much does the same thing. Now given, most people aren't sick at 7:00am and pooping like madmen unless they are hung over.

We both finish, and walk out at basically the same time. It was my boss next to me.



We never talked about that again, but he did offer to take me out for drinks that night.
grappler0000
6/23/07 8:31:33PM
You should send him an anonymous email with this link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzO1mCAVyMw
babalu2720
6/23/07 8:48:17PM

Posted by butterballs

I don't mind talking while I'm pissing. However, the other day I got into the office early but my stomach was killing me (hangover). I go into the bathroom and commence one of the worst whiskey shit sessions of my life. Right before round 2 started, someone walks into the stall next to me and pretty much does the same thing. Now given, most people aren't sick at 7:00am and pooping like madmen unless they are hung over.

We both finish, and walk out at basically the same time. It was my boss next to me.



We never talked about that again, but he did offer to take me out for drinks that night.



Classic and embarassing at the same time
BigTomZ
6/23/07 9:55:28PM
I have a really good job so I wouldn't want to jeapordize it by beating his ass. I really wanted to though. I have no idea who he is or where he works, the building is huge. I just know if I'm ever pissing and he walks in again, I will immediately move to a stall rather than have that fag trying to check out my sausage.

I always respect the buffer zone. Even if there are alot of people in the bathroom, I'll see if there are any empty stalls first.

Now talking while pissing is another thing that goes against proper mens room etiquette. Why would anyone want to talk to another guy while you both have your penis in your hand?
MisFiT
6/23/07 9:59:42PM
Or you can always just bust out with shit like "how's it lookin over there dude? mine looks like a fuckin bulvarian pretzel!"
madmarck
6/23/07 10:47:18PM

Posted by BigTomZ

Why can't people respect my buffer zone?

Earlier today I am in the bathroom at work. It is a big bathroom. You go in and around the corner and there are 8 urinals along the wall. I am the only person in there and I am at the urinal at the far end of the row. Some dude comes in, and comes all the way down the row, walking past 6 open urinals, and uses the one right next to me. What is worse is that he farted while he was next to me. Everyone farts in the bathroom, but did he really need to be close to someone to do it? Part of me wanted to just turn and piss on his leg.

What is with that? Do people not know about proper men's room etiquette? What happened to the minimum 1 urinal buffer zone?



There is always that one awkward weird guy who looks too when yu are pissin. I hate those guys,
BigTomZ
6/23/07 10:51:39PM
Hell yeah it is so weird when you see someone checking out your package. Then it is even more weird if they realize you saw them. They should feel very lucky they aren't unconscious on the floor.
Trapt1nw0nder
6/25/07 10:25:37AM
Was it Tim Sylvia?


I heard he did the same to Reggie Warren Jr. before Reggie whooped his ass(after he finished pissing of course)http://youtube.com/watch?v=mftOj6HHaWw&mode=related&search=
rcg916
6/25/07 10:34:28AM

Posted by Trapt1nw0nder

Was it Tim Sylvia?


I heard he did the same to Reggie Warren Jr. before Reggie whooped his ass(after he finished pissing of course)<a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=mftOj6HHaWw&mode=related&search=" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">http://youtube.com/watch?v=mftOj6HHaWw&mode=related&search=</a></a>



EEKS
6/25/07 1:14:03PM
Woulda whooped some ass.
Signal2112
6/27/07 7:04:01AM
I would have had a stern word, I'm not sure criminal charges are quite worth it in the case of a flouting of bathroom etiquette.
BigTomZ
6/27/07 11:34:46AM
dude it just happened again. what the hell is with people breaking the unwritten rules of the mens bathroom?

i was in the bathroom today taking a dump. i was all the way down at the far end of a row of like 6 stalls, all of which were unoccupied except the one i was in. so i'm just sitting there dropping the kids off at the pool, minding my own business. i hear footsteps getting closer, then someone goes into the stall next to me. he sits down and says "whats up man", i just stay quiet. then he starts lighting it up, sounds real nasty too. then i hear him say "man that taco bell got me".
cowcatcher
6/27/07 11:41:52AM
if im in a stall dropping a duece and someone else takes up a stall next to me i try my damndest to fart and shit as loud as possible, and if he does a better job of it i congratulate him and say nice out. piss pouch look stealing is horrible though, i dont know why some guys cant face the front and finish painting the urinal yellow.
BigTomZ
6/27/07 3:24:40PM
when someone looks at my package at the urinal i always say something to get them to stop. last time i said "you admiring the great one?". he stopped looking when i said that. that is about the only time you'll hear me talk in the bathroom.
asterisk
6/23/08 1:36:06AM
How does shit ever get ON the toilet seat? What the hell has to be going on for that to happen?
Rush
6/23/08 11:29:10AM
Another urinal ettiquette that I wish people would follow (in addition to space and talking limitations) is that if you can't piss without making a bunch of heavy breathing or other sounds, go into the stall. The last thing I want to hear when I am taking a leak is a guy breathing and grunting like he has the clap or passing a stone.
emfleek
6/23/08 11:43:51AM
2 words.

COURTESY FLUSH

asterisk
6/23/08 12:53:45PM

Posted by Rush

Another urinal ettiquette that I wish people would follow (in addition to space and talking limitations) is that if you can't piss without making a bunch of heavy breathing or other sounds, go into the stall. The last thing I want to hear when I am taking a leak is a guy breathing and grunting like he has the clap or passing a stone.



Oh man, I know exactly what you mean! Props. However, one of the funniest things I've ever seen was two dudes have a "grunt off" while pissing when I walked in to change my kid's diaper. The poor guy taking a dump probably thought there was some sort of crazy lucha libre sex celebration going on.
holt8081
6/23/08 3:58:28PM
start crakin up and ask if thats what he calls a dick and see if he moves over.
Bemin
6/23/08 5:28:30PM
holt8081
6/23/08 11:20:50PM
thats funny
Aaronno9
6/23/08 11:45:01PM
Well, im glad you guys live nowhere near me becouse i guess i have the worst bathroom etiquette in the world. I just go to whatever urinal is closest to me, im partial to the odd sigh of relief if ive been holding it in for a while, i often to talk to people standing next to me (although sometimes its just solely to amuse myself if they get shy and cant continue peeing) and i have to admit theirs been the odd occasion when ive made a comparison or two.

That said, i only do these things when im out at a bar or club and im wasted, or if im in university. Thats the only time i use pubic toilets really.
asterisk
6/24/08 12:29:28AM

Posted by Aaronno9

Well, im sad you guys live nowhere near me becouse sometimes solely to amuse myself i have to admit ive made a comparison or two.



Fixed your post. Next time you're looking at a dude's package, make sure someone takes a picture from behind the two of you so I can make a "fail" pic out of it.
Aaronno9
6/24/08 3:16:50AM

Posted by asterisk


Posted by Aaronno9

Well, im sad you guys live nowhere near me becouse sometimes solely to amuse myself i have to admit ive made a comparison or two.



Fixed your post. Next time you're looking at a dude's package, make sure someone takes a picture from behind the two of you so I can make a "fail" pic out of it.




Hows about i just take a photo of the dudes package, and send you that instead. I know you'd like that more.
NatedawgThaM
6/24/08 3:28:51AM
"STOP STARING AT MY DICK!!!!"

See the movie "Waiting..." lol, this dude has a fear of peeing in public bathrooms since somebody was staring at his dick. he got all paranoid that the next time somebody stood next to him, he randomly shouted, STOP STARING AT MY DICK!

A great way to embarrass someone...



Pookie
6/24/08 6:16:39AM

Posted by Mastodon2

Such obvious breaking of the "Guard Zone" is an obvious attempt to catch a glimpse of your spongle, avoid him at all costs in future. Or turn towards the wall.



Perfectly put.
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