Good pick up lines/converstion starters?

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emfleek
10/8/08 2:29:34PM

Posted by sleevey

This is the best line I ever used and it has worked multiple times along with a few good smakcs to the face

I was at a bar and had noticed these 2 girls we caught glances a few times and they were talking to the bar tender I went up introduced myself and bought them a few drinks after some small talk names shit like that I looked at the bartender who had been trying to pick these gilrs up and said you know what my dick might not be the longest one in here shit there is a chance that a may not even be the thickest one in here but I guarentte you it is the prettiest cock in all of sunny FL. and god as my witness the very next words out of there mouth was prove it so all 3 of us went to the restroom weel use your imagination


That line has worked many many many times however be prepared to back it up and be ready cause you may get a nice bitch slap.



You have to be kidding me. Did these girls happen to have cobwebs between their legs, too?
Naturaldisaster
10/8/08 2:57:09PM
a couple funny ones i've used or want to use.

"Hey how about you and I got get a pepperoni pizza and F*ck?" then she'll say no. "Why? you dont like pizza???"

"Is your last name cambells? cuz your mmm mmm good"

"all this could be yours for one Low price!"

"is your last name crack? Cuz your dope!"

dannyfrank
10/8/08 2:57:35PM
my all time favorite is: "there's 206 bones in the body.... want one more?"

i have never used it but im sure that it wont work
disorderlyvision
10/8/08 7:42:51PM

Posted by ko-kbo130

**** me if im wrong but i think you wanna blow me




Posted by madmarck
You have got just the right amount of ugly for me.



holy shxt those were funny
SpiderSilva
10/9/08 7:57:26PM
I have eyes that the ladies love all I have to do is smile and say hi and they come to me me then I got married they still come but don't go home
JohnnyNapalm
10/10/08 4:16:18AM
"Nice tits."

Short and to the point.


MFOTHER
10/10/08 2:35:36PM
i didnt read rthem all, but if it hasnt been said....go up ad say

my friends bet me $50 i couldn't start a conversation with the best looking girl here.....want to spend some of their money?
jiujitsufreak74
10/10/08 2:41:13PM

Posted by MFOTHER

i didnt read rthem all, but if it hasnt been said....go up ad say

my friends bet me $50 i couldn't start a conversation with the best looking girl here.....want to spend some of their money?



that's actually a good one and i'm going to steal that if you don;t mind
telnights
10/10/08 6:18:14PM
I have buddy I grew up with that would ask almost every women he thought was hot if they wanted to F&%^. Now 90% of the time he would get slapped, spit on, or something tossed in his face. But 10% of the time he would get a yes. He still does this to this day and it still works for him. There wasn't a day that went by when we were room mates that he didn't bring a new girl home.
Red-Dragon
10/11/08 4:34:10PM
You know how fit birds always seem to have an ugly mate....

Well walk up to them and say to the ugly one "do you fancy a dance love"?
As she is ugly the chances are that she will say "yes"
To which you reply - " well the dancefloors that way, so fu*k off coz I want to chat to your mate"
Aaronno9
10/11/08 10:32:23PM
Just be nice. Seriously, every time i go out, if a girl starts talking to me i just be as nice as possible, and it works wounders. I know all my buddies are laughing at me for being totally out of character, but they aint laughin at home in their beds with the only female in the imediate proximity being their moms.
Pookie
10/12/08 4:19:35AM

Posted by 40ouncetofreedom

You :Want to have Magic Sex?
Girl: Whats magic sex i've never had that before.
You: We bone,You dissappear....TaDah Bitch..



I must say that you just blew my ******* mind.
Pookie
10/12/08 4:56:26AM
Well, i have a little sister that i like to help take care of (Got to keep her off the stripper pole), so i take her out with me to restaurants and stores and such.

I remember one night i was at olive garden and our hostess was absolutely gorgeous, 10/10 on anybodys scale, Really. When we get to the table i tell my sister cheyenne that ill get her ice cream for dessert if she talks to the pretty hostess to me. Being the awesome little sister she is, she agrees. She memorizes her lines and she walks right up to the hostess, tugs on her tight black dress and says

Cheyenne: "Excuse me"
Hostess: "Oh my god, you are so adorable! What can i do for you?
Cheyenne: "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Hostess: "You are soooo cute...no, sweetie, I don't have a boyfriend."
Cheyenne: "I know the perfect guy for you!!"
(On cue, she turns and points to me, and I walk up and pick her up in my arms)
Me: "I'm sorry, was she bothering you?"
Hostess: ""Oh my goodness no...she is so adorable...is she yours?"
Me: "Mine? Oh no, I can barely take care of myself; I could never keep up with her. (I turn to Cheyenne, still in my arms) Cheyenne, who am I?"
Cheyenne: "You're my big brother Jordan!!!" (Followed by a big hug and her giving me a kiss on the cheek)

The Woman was almost in tears at this point she was so overwhelmed by the scene. and as i went on to explain the to her the situation, and how im actively helping to take care of my sister "while our mother is out of town"... on a saturday night no less. Well... i ended up going out with this girl for half a year. Easily my most mack-ish moment ever.

Btw - I let my sister order whatever she wanted for dinner that night, and she chose 4 servings of ice cream. lol
kris_ericson
10/12/08 1:49:54PM
are you from the flinstones cuz im goin to make your bed rock!

ive never heard a story of it working and will laugh the day it does
Naturaldisaster
10/12/08 3:46:25PM

Posted by Pookie

Well, i have a little sister that i like to help take care of (Got to keep her off the stripper pole), so i take her out with me to restaurants and stores and such.

I remember one night i was at olive garden and our hostess was absolutely gorgeous, 10/10 on anybodys scale, Really. When we get to the table i tell my sister cheyenne that ill get her ice cream for dessert if she talks to the pretty hostess to me. Being the awesome little sister she is, she agrees. She memorizes her lines and she walks right up to the hostess, tugs on her tight black dress and says

Cheyenne: "Excuse me"
Hostess: "Oh my god, you are so adorable! What can i do for you?
Cheyenne: "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Hostess: "You are soooo cute...no, sweetie, I don't have a boyfriend."
Cheyenne: "I know the perfect guy for you!!"
(On cue, she turns and points to me, and I walk up and pick her up in my arms)
Me: "I'm sorry, was she bothering you?"
Hostess: ""Oh my goodness no...she is so adorable...is she yours?"
Me: "Mine? Oh no, I can barely take care of myself; I could never keep up with her. (I turn to Caitlin, still in my arms) Cheyenne, who am I?"
Cheyenne: "You're my big brother Jordan!!!" (Followed by a big hug and her giving me a kiss on the cheek)

The Woman was almost in tears at this point she was so overwhelmed by the scene. and as i went on to explain the to her the situation, and how im actively helping to take care of my sister "while our mother is out of town"... on a saturday night no less. Well... i ended up going out with this girl for half a year. Easily my most mack-ish moment ever.

Btw - I let my sister order whatever she wanted for dinner that night, and she chose 4 servings of ice cream. lol



thats awesome
mrsmiley
10/13/08 2:56:38PM
Go up to a lady and say--



"You know,I don't know much about the femal anatomy,but I would love to suck your D#*K

They will love it!
mikevolz
10/13/08 3:05:56PM

Posted by Naturaldisaster


Posted by Pookie

Well, i have a little sister that i like to help take care of (Got to keep her off the stripper pole), so i take her out with me to restaurants and stores and such.

I remember one night i was at olive garden and our hostess was absolutely gorgeous, 10/10 on anybodys scale, Really. When we get to the table i tell my sister cheyenne that ill get her ice cream for dessert if she talks to the pretty hostess to me. Being the awesome little sister she is, she agrees. She memorizes her lines and she walks right up to the hostess, tugs on her tight black dress and says

Cheyenne: "Excuse me"
Hostess: "Oh my god, you are so adorable! What can i do for you?
Cheyenne: "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Hostess: "You are soooo cute...no, sweetie, I don't have a boyfriend."
Cheyenne: "I know the perfect guy for you!!"
(On cue, she turns and points to me, and I walk up and pick her up in my arms)
Me: "I'm sorry, was she bothering you?"
Hostess: ""Oh my goodness no...she is so adorable...is she yours?"
Me: "Mine? Oh no, I can barely take care of myself; I could never keep up with her. (I turn to Caitlin, still in my arms) Cheyenne, who am I?"
Cheyenne: "You're my big brother Jordan!!!" (Followed by a big hug and her giving me a kiss on the cheek)

The Woman was almost in tears at this point she was so overwhelmed by the scene. and as i went on to explain the to her the situation, and how im actively helping to take care of my sister "while our mother is out of town"... on a saturday night no less. Well... i ended up going out with this girl for half a year. Easily my most mack-ish moment ever.

Btw - I let my sister order whatever she wanted for dinner that night, and she chose 4 servings of ice cream. lol



thats awesome



its also stolen from tucker max
dannyfrank
10/13/08 3:07:59PM

Posted by Pookie

Well, i have a little sister that i like to help take care of (Got to keep her off the stripper pole), so i take her out with me to restaurants and stores and such.

I remember one night i was at olive garden and our hostess was absolutely gorgeous, 10/10 on anybodys scale, Really. When we get to the table i tell my sister cheyenne that ill get her ice cream for dessert if she talks to the pretty hostess to me. Being the awesome little sister she is, she agrees. She memorizes her lines and she walks right up to the hostess, tugs on her tight black dress and says

Cheyenne: "Excuse me"
Hostess: "Oh my god, you are so adorable! What can i do for you?
Cheyenne: "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Hostess: "You are soooo cute...no, sweetie, I don't have a boyfriend."
Cheyenne: "I know the perfect guy for you!!"
(On cue, she turns and points to me, and I walk up and pick her up in my arms)
Me: "I'm sorry, was she bothering you?"
Hostess: ""Oh my goodness no...she is so adorable...is she yours?"
Me: "Mine? Oh no, I can barely take care of myself; I could never keep up with her. (I turn to Cheyenne, still in my arms) Cheyenne, who am I?"
Cheyenne: "You're my big brother Jordan!!!" (Followed by a big hug and her giving me a kiss on the cheek)

The Woman was almost in tears at this point she was so overwhelmed by the scene. and as i went on to explain the to her the situation, and how im actively helping to take care of my sister "while our mother is out of town"... on a saturday night no less. Well... i ended up going out with this girl for half a year. Easily my most mack-ish moment ever.

Btw - I let my sister order whatever she wanted for dinner that night, and she chose 4 servings of ice cream. lol



damn. you're good
disorderlyvision
10/14/08 9:49:50PM
these were just sent to me in an e-mail


1) Did you fart?
cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?
cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea
I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you was a tree & I was a Squirrel,
I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,
but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - 'Fat Penguin!'
Woman - 'WHAT?'
Man - 'I just wanted to say something that would break the ice.'

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,
but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went inta this cheap motel room...

11) Yer eyes are as blue as winder cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,
we kin sleep til afternoon.


AND.. the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up
jiujitsufreak74
10/14/08 9:59:10PM

Posted by disorderlyvision

these were just sent to me in an e-mail


1) Did you fart?
cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?
cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea
I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you was a tree & I was a Squirrel,
I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,
but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - 'Fat Penguin!'
Woman - 'WHAT?'
Man - 'I just wanted to say something that would break the ice.'

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,
but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went inta this cheap motel room...

11) Yer eyes are as blue as winder cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,
we kin sleep til afternoon.


AND.. the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up



did anyone else read this in a pirates voice?
bigbubbano23
10/14/08 10:41:48PM
i want to kiss you passionately on the lips, then work my way up to your bellybutton
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