Which UFC fighter would you choose?

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shaneTpain
7/30/12 8:21:01PM
Okay IMAGINE if you will...

You wake up tomorrow morning & roll out of bed. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK! Dana White is knocking on your door with his perfectly round hairless head. You open the door &..
"YOU F*&#!@N WON!"- Dana exclaims as he hands you a dozen balloons. He drops various curse words for a good ten minutes, introduces you to a clown named Charlie & then finally explains to you........

"You won a UFC contest ! You get to live, train, hang & party with a UFC fighter for an entire week!!! You get to choose any fighter off of the UFC or Strikeforce roster!!! The only stipulation is at the end of the week you have to step inside the cage with the fighter & get your ass WHOOPED."

So which fighter do you choose?
& how does the end-of-the-week fight unfold between you two? (aka how does the fighter MERK you? )

yes. i am very bored.
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FastKnockout
7/30/12 8:30:47PM
I'd probably go with Mayhem.

He was one of my favorite coaches on TUF and I thought he did an incredible job with his guys. Always trained em hard but had some fun with em, too. The best coaches are the guys who can balance friendship and professionalism. Outside of training the dude was crazy as hell and seemed fun to be around. So yeah, Mayhem.

As far as the fight goes... He'd kick my ass for the 1st round but I'd come in the 2nd and 3rd and dominate his gassed ass.
DrivenDavies15
7/30/12 8:32:09PM
Haha love the creativeness here.

I would probs choose Thiago Alves cuz he seems like a pretty chill dude and is my fav fighter.

Our fight would probs consist of me attempting flying armbars and triangles while he takes my leg off with some of his signature kicks and I won't be able to walk for a week... but it'll still be AWESOME
Pookie
7/30/12 8:41:34PM
Ill go with Georges St. Pierre for the amount of Vag that would get rejected and then thrown in my direction.

The fight starts. I tap out.
babalu46
7/30/12 8:47:59PM
I'd never find out about the contest because i'm scared of clowns and would have run a F*@$ING mile!!!

Minus the clown thing i'd probably choose Pat Barry dude seems hilarious and is one of my favourite fighters.

Fight starts. Head kick thrown. I'm eating through a straw for months. Good times
Budgellism
7/30/12 9:23:24PM
Hendo. There are a ton of reasons for this. He's a legend, he's been one of my favourite fighters since I first discovered MMA but most importantly, how great a story is that to tell? I survived (hopefully) an H-Bomb from Hendo.

The fight would go just like you think. I'd be pulling a Bisping except I wouldn't make it out of the first 30 seconds.
ghandikush
7/30/12 9:39:14PM
Anderson probably. I would ask him politely before the fight to not break my face.

May not get any girls for the fight but get to go out against one of the greats.
infestructure
7/30/12 10:11:41PM
Pat Barry without a doubt. If I'm going to get beaten up, I want to have a laugh doing it. My only stipulation is we aren't drug tested and get to smoke up large after every training session.

Oh and our fight:

Round one:
The referee Herb Dean starts the fight, Infestructure and Barry touch gloves - Infestructure goes in ducking low and swings a haymaker which bounces off Barry's hardened head Infestructure's hand breaks and he goes to the ground. The fight is over at 0 minutes and 10 seconds. Barry and Infestructure go and smoke a fat bowl, then go into Vegas to enjoy a night of smoking, drinking and debauchery with Uncle Dana's credit card
prophecy033
7/30/12 10:15:45PM
Matt Riddle because I would get to trip on Acid and once fight time rolled around I wouldn't give a shit if I got punched because I would be laughing so hard at how much of a Dork he is
infestructure
7/30/12 10:20:06PM

Posted by prophecy033

Matt Riddle because I would get to trip on Acid and once fight time rolled around I wouldn't give a shit if I got punched because I would be laughing so hard at how much of a Dork he is



This has FOTN written all over it
187
7/30/12 10:44:17PM
I could see me and chris leben getting drunk and pissing on each other for a week.

the fight would start with me hungover, doubled up with my hands on my knees and reeking of stale piss during the fighter intrductions. I'd give my corner puppy dog eyes just before the bell rings and they'd throw in the towel before the fight starts, ufc 3 style.
kopower
7/30/12 11:30:01PM
Great question. Hmm, I'd want someone cool as hell to train with, and chill afterwards. Also would want someone that wouldn't break my face, or limbs come fight time.

I'm thinking Clay Guida would be a blast. Seems like a cool guy that's always happy.

The fight would start out typical Guida style. Clay bouncing around, throwing one punch, then back pedaling . He would eventually take me down, and either choke me out, dry hump a rash on me, or win via gnp while I turtle up on the mat.
BlueSkiesBurn
7/30/12 11:30:43PM
Easy, Sean Salmon. You guys are looking at this all wrong. You're looking at an all-expenses-paid vacation and trying to share that with a cool fighter.

Fuck that, I'm picking a guy I think I can beat and spending Uncle Dana's money the same.
hotrodttt
7/31/12 12:08:57AM
Ronda Rousy
Chael_Sonnen
7/31/12 12:28:19AM
Wanderlei Silva

Reason(s) why.....

Free Botox
Easy fight
Poor_Franklin
7/31/12 12:51:47AM
Ronda Rousey no doubt.
cowcatcher
7/31/12 1:40:08AM
Fitch - Getting paid to have a guy lay on me for 15 minutes? Sounds like a typical Saturday.
prophecy033
7/31/12 2:25:10AM

Posted by cowcatcher

Fitch - Getting paid to have a guy lay on me for 15 minutes? Sounds like a typical Saturday.

Only if Fitch used anal beads
Budgellism
7/31/12 7:12:04AM

Posted by BlueSkiesBurn

Easy, Sean Salmon. You guys are looking at this all wrong. You're looking at an all-expenses-paid vacation and trying to share that with a cool fighter.

Fuck that, I'm picking a guy I think I can beat and spending Uncle Dana's money the same.



Sean Salmon would still kick my ass so why not get a great experience out of it? One shot from Hendo and I'm done. Salmon would end up ground and pounding me for a solid minute.
airkerma
7/31/12 10:23:08AM
Kalib Starnes. If I walked slightly forward the whole fight I would win a UD 30-25.
prophecy033
7/31/12 11:14:20AM

Posted by BlueSkiesBurn

Easy, Sean Salmon. You guys are looking at this all wrong. You're looking at an all-expenses-paid vacation and trying to share that with a cool fighter.

Fuck that, I'm picking a guy I think I can beat and spending Uncle Dana's money the same.

Why not go Bob Sapp then?
jae_1833
8/1/12 2:26:10AM
I would have to go with a LHW unfortunately....in that regards I would chose Chuck.....it's simple, if I lose it would be relatively quick, I hit hard so if I land that lucky shot he is done! Win, win as losing always hurt and I am supposed to.....and dude is known for parties! Plus he is not so shredded that I wont feel as nasty standing across from him shirtless.
mrsmiley
8/1/12 7:36:27AM
I weigh 240 but I would beg for Royce. At least he might take it easy on me.
hymiekooken
8/1/12 6:17:13PM
I would have to say Nate Diaz. We could spend the whole week in Cali getting high and partying, plus I would get to hang out with Nick too. I would be evil when we went out and be like, hey Nate, that guy over there was talking about your mama and says he is gonna beat your ass....As for the fight, I promise the most epic staredown in UFC history, once the fight starts, well, I would try one overhand right, and one head hick, both of which will probably miss by miles, would hope to go to the ground where I would have the obvious advantage...
And then get tapped out in seconds by a gogo or something.
Gogoplatapus
8/1/12 11:53:57PM
Nick and Nate. Re: Weed.

Or Rogan. Re: Weed.
crushedbacon
8/3/12 12:08:18AM

Posted by Gogoplatapus

Nick and Nate. Re: Weed.

Or Rogan. Re: Weed.



Ha, ya the Diaz brothers for sure. I'd like to hang with Junior Dos Santos for a day too, the guy just has such a positive vibe.... Came across this video... I remember seeing a clip awhile back with Rousey visiting the Diaz bros, I guess this is episode 4, pretty sure some chronic is being blazed on a daily basis.

Ronda Rousey Trip To The 209
Michael_Corleone
8/3/12 11:21:39AM
Anderson Silva. Just so I can videotape him clowning me on the feet before he puts me out of my misery. You gotta think he'd get a couple strikes landed that have never been seen before in MMA. That alone would be worth it.

But in the week leading up I would gain valuable knowledge and training from the absolute best ever. An opportunity like that only knocks once in a lifetime.
Bubbles
8/4/12 12:18:54AM
Keith Jardine. Favourite fighter, his KO of Griffin got me into the sport, learn the ways of the Techno Viking, get some poon, and have a 0.001% chance at winning the fight.

GSP for the reason Pookie mentioned makes him my #2

Rousey is #3 only if there is a 100% guarantee I get "surprised"
AnthonyMorrison
8/16/12 12:38:31PM
Omega_8
8/20/12 4:27:55PM
Matt Horowich. i imagine that would be an interesting experience
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